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Song Parodies -> "You've Got a 'Friend'"

Original Song Title:

"You've Got a Friend"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

James Taylor

Parody Song Title:

"You've Got a 'Friend'"

Parody Written by:

John A. Barry

The Lyrics

He'll get down and nuzzle
While he kneads with helping hand
On a pair, a paragon of what's right.
Foley eyes kids in D.C.,
Emails them from his lair.
His cell lights up; teen-talkin', Mark, ain't right.

He'll just call up a page
Or blow his mind with an IM:
"Can I rub ya?! oh, baby,
Such a state I'm in!"

When it springs up, he will call,
Enthralled at the thought of small
Boys being where, yeah, yeah, yeah,
He wants to spend.

He's the guy who loves youth.
His name's Mark, and he's endowed.
He exhorts short kids to give him a blow.

Seek some head from fledglings
Then'd crawl to where they're prowed,
And poon-like is the back-door notch he adores.

Enthralled by underage
Boys, he flirts with them in IM:
"Can I rub ya, oh, baby.
Do you use the gym?"

Den and his ilk are "appalled."
All protesteth that they are galled.
They were aware yeah, yeah, yeah.

Hey, ain't it bad to know you've got such a "friend"?
The creep wants you in his fold.
He'll flirt you, then try to squirt you.
He'll take your hole if you let him--
Watch out and don't you let him.

He'll call when hormones rage
In non-Shakespearean iambs:
"Can I rub ya baby?! Such a state I'm in!"

Winter discontent: it falls
Fallstaffian Den's "appalled."
And Mark is where?
Oh, he's ill--
Off the deep end.
Because he'd bend
His tainted elbow. Didn't intend
Plaints: his wood to blow. He'll say "Amen."
Shift blame to Den.

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 5

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 0
 0
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
 0
 
 4   0
 0
 0
 
 5   5
 5
 5
 

User Comments

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dioa - October 09, 2006 - Report this comment
Great job JB, but this song was from the 70s. Being that you were alive then, you should know that.
alvin rhodes - October 09, 2006 - Report this comment
direct hit...5s
AFW - October 09, 2006 - Report this comment
You have definitely hit the Mark with this....by the way, what's going on with this website..so slow, and no page centering?
John Barry - October 09, 2006 - Report this comment
Thanks, dioa, for the correction. Thanks, Alvin, AFW.
TJC - October 09, 2006 - Report this comment
There's no Marked paucity of humor in you quadraubermondayopus!
PMS - October 10, 2006 - Report this comment
555

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