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Song Parodies -> "Wives By Numbers"

Original Song Title:

"Wives and Lovers"

Original Performer:

Jack Jones

Parody Song Title:

"Wives By Numbers"

Parody Written by:

John A. Barry

The Lyrics

Hey, little girl,
Bun your hair; use no makeup,
Soon you'll be wife 24.
Ain't got enough room for rings on his finger;
Of wives he's more than a score

More wives he's wantin', so he'll love you.
After he's finished humping number 22,
He'll score with you.

Laid on the day
That you'd just turned 11,
Although it could have been 10.
Now you must wash with your hair that was curled up
His feet, then knot it again.

For wives should always be mum and do
Just what their husbands and the prophet tell them to,
Year after year.

Hey, little girl,
Better wear something prairie,
In this Texas aerie, that drags in the sand.
They've dimmed the lights in your mind.
For abused chicks, time to get ready for "hon."
You're one of 20-
plus hons with his oven buns.

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Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 5

Voting Breakdown

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User Comments

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BelowAgeVotress - May 28, 2008 - Report this comment
It appears that you're back in true BarryEsque form, Captain Jack Barrow !! . . . watch out for that 'Trick Knee' little girl !
2Eagle - May 28, 2008 - Report this comment
That's telling it like it is. Would you believe that case was thrown out of court?
alvin - May 28, 2008 - Report this comment
wear something prarie...lol
John Barry - May 28, 2008 - Report this comment
Thanks, BAV, 2Eagle, Alvin.
AFW - May 28, 2008 - Report this comment
Good biting satire on current event,...and good to see ya' back, John

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