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Song Parodies -> "The Man Who Said Fox Sure Ain't Balanced"

Original Song Title:

"The Man Who Shot Liberty Valance"

Original Performer:

Gene Pitney

Parody Song Title:

"The Man Who Said Fox Sure Ain't Balanced"

Parody Written by:

Michael Pacholek

The Lyrics

Unfortunately, this song remains fiction. After all, there's no way in hell Bill O'Really? will ever let William Tong on his show. Or me.
They said "Fair and Balanced" gives them the crown
the womenfolk, they lied.
They lied.
They said "Fair and Balanced" all over town
the men on-air, so snide.
'Cause the pull of the bucks was the only law
Republicans understood.
When it came to playing loose and fast...
they were mighty good.

From out of the East a stranger came
a liberal with a plan
a man
the kind of a man the West and South would need
but Fox had panned.
'Cause the pull of the bucks was the only law
Republicans understood.
When it came to playing loose and fast...
they were mighty good.

Many a man would say "Fox lies!"
and many a man would fall!
The man who said, "Fox sure ain't balanced!"
He said, "Fox sure ain't balanced!"
He was the bravest of them all!

The love of this land can make a man run on
when he should stay
stay home.
Campaign for the White House, tell the truth
inside Capitol's dome.
But the pull of the bucks was the only law
Republicans understood.
When it came to playing loose and fast...
"liberal" was no good.

Beat down and afraid she prayed that he'd return
that fateful night
at nine.
She knew that O'Reilly didn't fight no fair
it just ain't right.
From the moment a girl first sees TV
the very first thing she learns
when a man enters the No-Spin Zone
only one returns.

Everyone heard, "You're lying, Bill!"
They all saw O'Reilly fall!
The man who said, "Fox sure ain't balanced!"
He said, "Fox sure ain't balanced!"
He was the bravest of them all!

The man who said, "Fox sure ain't balanced!"
He said, "Fox sure ain't balanced!"
He was the bravest of them all!

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 3.5
How Funny: 3.3
Overall Rating: 3.4

Total Votes: 17

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   6
 7
 6
 
 2   0
 0
 1
 
 3   0
 0
 0
 
 4   2
 1
 1
 
 5   9
 9
 9
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

alvin rhodes - November 30, 2004 - Report this comment
great parody...5s
AFW - November 30, 2004 - Report this comment
good job...
Michael Pacholek - December 01, 2004 - Report this comment
Tyranny fell in 1781, and 1865, and 1945, and 1965 (Voting Rights Act), and 1974, and 1992. It may take until 2008, but tyranny will fall again and justice will prevail. Sooner or later, it always does.
Righty - December 03, 2004 - Report this comment
Tyranny fell and justice prevailed in 2000 and 2004, not to mention in 2002. Moreover, the grim reaper is loose and hard at work, so I expect to see some more tyranny falling and justice prevailing as soon as 2005. It's the new technology: everything happens faster these days.
Lefty - March 01, 2005 - Report this comment
Ad hominem attacks are the last refuge of those defending an untenable position, i.e. right wing positions.
Michael Pacholek - March 01, 2005 - Report this comment
William Tong has now done "This Monarch's Not Mentally Balanced." I hate to say it, but it's far from his best work.

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