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Song Parodies -> "It's a Lame Old Schlong"

Original Song Title:

"It's the Same Old Song"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Four Tops

Parody Song Title:

"It's a Lame Old Schlong"

Parody Written by:

John A. Barry

The Lyrics

Meat's hung catabolic'ly.
Though your honey beats that thing
It's not getting hard and there's pain
In her left hand and your lazy schlong.
You used to lance her all night long,
There used to be meat venery,
There was spender love, a juicery.

Now it's a lame old schlong
But with a different feeling with libido gone,
It's a lame old schlong
But with a different feeling; you can't ring the gong.

Bent, no-mettle tool, not high.
One time you could love long,
A warmer guy.
Now you Jell-o be, not vaultingly,
Decliningly--used to be incliningly
Steep, that spear-like part; she'd touch, it would dart
Staying tumescent forever
Dangling? Breaking down never!

It's a lame old schlong, don't want to bare it.
It is not upward-leaning with libido gone.
It's a lame old schlong
(Limp as a lariat).
There's a diffident leaning with libido gone.

Precious memories of her lingerie on.
It was like a spear; she favored it long.
Now it's gone--
Cleft, an empty nest--
Was bonely, tumescent and quite happily spent.
And in your pants it was moving,
Your romance, it was grooving.

Now it's a lame old schlong
But with a different feeling with libido gone.
It's a lame old schlong
But with a different feeling; you can't ring the gong.
Can bare or bare it.
Now it's a lame old schlong
But with a different feeling with libido gone
(You break a sweat to raise it).
It's a lame old schlong. . . .

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.8
How Funny: 4.5
Overall Rating: 4.5

Total Votes: 8

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 1
 1
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   1
 0
 0
 
 4   0
 0
 0
 
 5   7
 7
 7
 

User Comments

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Johnny D - April 15, 2005 - Report this comment
I'm laughing out loud AGAIN! 5's!
Rick D - April 15, 2005 - Report this comment
Note the alliteration in the chorus and the comment. These Johns just juxtapose with jocularity.
John Barry - April 15, 2005 - Report this comment
Thanks, Rick and JD. A little Alliteration lightens the load.
Leo Lay - April 15, 2005 - Report this comment
Wonderful wanker wit.
alvin rhodes - April 15, 2005 - Report this comment
i'd love to see the four tops do this live..with choreography
Michael Pacholek - April 15, 2005 - Report this comment
Glad you dick-tated this one.
Rick C - April 16, 2005 - Report this comment
I somehow missed this one yesterday. Glad I looked over the list again! When I saw the title, there was no way I couldn't read it. I was hooked. You, my friend, are a master baiter....555

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