A Tchotchke Fan

Just feast your eyes on everything I prize,
Like oversize Elvis bookends.
Look, here's another: a toilet-paper cover
That shows all the cast members of "Friends."

'Cause I'm just a tchotchke fan,
Love Hummel lambs,
Gaudy shotglass for rum.
Faces show mirth,
These cherubs have girth—
So smiling and cute and plump.

Good buys, eBay, on porcelain ladies
Dressed in fluffy rococo gowns.
Soon I'll be vyin' to be the one who's buyin',
As long as other bids stay down.

I'm a confirmed tchotchke fan.
Plastic eggplants
Sit next to my wax fruit.
In the real world, I found myself a girl,
And she's a tchotchke fan too!