Song Parodies -> Pishing and Moping
| Original Song Title: | "Wishing And Hoping" |
| Original Performer: | Dusty Springfield |
| Parody Song Title: | "Pishing and Moping" |
| Parody Written by: | Tommy Turtle |
A little relationship advice from an expert. (I must be an expert on relationships -- I've had hundreds of 'em!) Sort of the "antidote song" to the many "gross guy" parodies here, including yours truly's. Both the OS lyrics and Midi are here -- how cool is that?
Pissin' and fartin' and stinkin' and sprayin'
Scratchin' and creamin' too soon at each chance
That won't get you into her pants
So, if you're lookin' to find "love" she will share
All you gotta do is
Hold it and squelch it and stuff it
And wear clean underwear
You gotta show her that you care just for her
Put the seat down when you're through
Wash your hair once for her
'Cause...
You won't get her
Stinkin' and a-sprayin'
Pissin' and a-fartin'
Just pissin' and fartin' and stinkin' and sprayin'
Scratchin' and beamin' at ev'ry young tart
That won't get her virtue to part
So, if you're lookin' to find skin creamy, bare
All you gotta do is
Hold her; don't dis her, disease her, or tease her,
Yeah, just please her, and after you do:
Your turn to jizz
You gotta show her that you care just for her
Pick up socks; get your own beer
Moon, don't bare, just for her
'Cause....
You won't get her
Watchin' porn a-tapin'
Thumpin' chest and apin'
Just pissin' and fartin' and stinkin' and sprayin'
Rammin' and reamin' without kiss at start
Your genes won't through her jeans impart
Dare stare: mare... bear-in' rare pair; fair... derr-i-ere
All you gotta do: Not --
-- Scold her; cajoled: her; behold her, enfold her
Yeah, give gold: her, and drown her in furs
You will be hers
You will be hers
You... will... be... hers!
Scratchin' and creamin' too soon at each chance
That won't get you into her pants
So, if you're lookin' to find "love" she will share
All you gotta do is
Hold it and squelch it and stuff it
And wear clean underwear
You gotta show her that you care just for her
Put the seat down when you're through
Wash your hair once for her
'Cause...
You won't get her
Stinkin' and a-sprayin'
Pissin' and a-fartin'
Just pissin' and fartin' and stinkin' and sprayin'
Scratchin' and beamin' at ev'ry young tart
That won't get her virtue to part
So, if you're lookin' to find skin creamy, bare
All you gotta do is
Hold her; don't dis her, disease her, or tease her,
Yeah, just please her, and after you do:
Your turn to jizz
You gotta show her that you care just for her
Pick up socks; get your own beer
Moon, don't bare, just for her
'Cause....
You won't get her
Watchin' porn a-tapin'
Thumpin' chest and apin'
Just pissin' and fartin' and stinkin' and sprayin'
Rammin' and reamin' without kiss at start
Your genes won't through her jeans impart
Dare stare: mare... bear-in' rare pair; fair... derr-i-ere
All you gotta do: Not --
-- Scold her; cajoled: her; behold her, enfold her
Yeah, give gold: her, and drown her in furs
You will be hers
You will be hers
You... will... be... hers!
Do as I say, not as I do. © 2006 Tommy Turtle.
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User Comments Follow...
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LOL! I loved all the word play, too many to mention, but here's an example: "Dare stare: mare... bear-in' rare pair; fair... derr-i-ere". Good advice for males in heat, hope they take it seriously. Or else... 5's
Looks as if I had forgotten to vote, but I voted tis time.
Is that why that last girlfriend gave me that vibrator back? Jeez, NOW he tells me...5's & LOL...~ ~ ~
good advice for the puberty-stricken
(snickers) well said & done 5's
This is definitely good advice...in fact..this version should be performed at weddings...5's
Adagio, thanks, they probably won't lol... Paul (lol), alvin (lol) carol, thanks... AFW, thanks; now there's a cool idea!!! Cut the divorce rate, I could retire on the royalties... How do we make that a law? (and in all fairness, can we sing to the brides "Prudish Little Girl"? http://www.amiright.com/parody/60s/theshirelles9.shtml (you've already seen it).
Are you SURE they don't like all this stuff? LOL! 555
How romantic, 5's
Rick C: So they usually tell me as they walk out the door... thanks! Larry Hensley, thanks... sing it to your gf and watch her swoon lol :)
"Yeah, just please her, and after you do..", TT you are a gentlemen, and from the same school as I, and learned the golden rule: Ladies come first, heh heh. I misread "and drown her in furs" as "and drown in her fur", which isn't a bad thing. 5s.
Funny version of another co dependent song from the Co dependent Queen.
Red Ant, thanks; you know what they say, "Nice guys finish last"... I always try to heh heh.... 2Eagle, thanks.
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This is view # 216
The Very Best of Dusty Springfield album at Amazon.com
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Ultimate Collection album at Amazon.com
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White Heat album at Amazon.com
Reputation & Rarities album at Amazon.com
Classics & Collectibles album at Amazon.com
Dusty... Definitely album at Amazon.com
A Girl Called Dusty album at Amazon.com
Dusty in Memphis album at Amazon.com
