Song Parodies -> I Always Seem To Injure You
| Original Song Title: | "I Only Want To Be With You" |
| Original Performer: | Dusty Springfield |
| Parody Song Title: | "I Always Seem To Injure You" |
| Parody Written by: | Kristof Robertson |
The course of true love NEVER runs smoothly....
I plum forgot about the thorns on your red rose
I bought you a small puppy and it bit your nose
And the fancy bouquetthat made you sneeze
Was full of angry Africanised killer bees
No matter what I do
I always seem to injure you
We tried to copy Romeo and Juliet
Til you fell off my balcony and broke your head
While can-dlelight dancinglike Fred and Ginge
I waltzed too near a naked flame; your hair did singe
Your dress ignited too
I always seem to injure you
A toast with French champagne:
The cork knocked out your two front tee-eeth
The ice sculpture of you I carved:
It fellpinned you underneath
I'm sorry, honey!
I may be romantic, but I'm such a putz
I didn't know those chocolates were filled with nuts
Coz you were allergic, your face went grey
I guess I won't be cooking you that beef satay
I do not have a clue
Enamoured, but I injure you
[INSTRUMENTAL]
Last night, while making love
I stroked your hair and kissed your fa-ace
We tried some Kama Sutra moves;
And now you're in a neck brace
A-whoopsadaisy!
I'm surprised we're still together; I'll admit
That when we go on dates I take a first aid kit
You know that I love yalet's marry soon!
I'll book a bed in ER for our honeymoon
My darling, please don't sue
I never mean to injure you!
I hope you're well insured
I always seem to injure you
I bought you a small puppy and it bit your nose
And the fancy bouquetthat made you sneeze
Was full of angry Africanised killer bees
No matter what I do
I always seem to injure you
We tried to copy Romeo and Juliet
Til you fell off my balcony and broke your head
While can-dlelight dancinglike Fred and Ginge
I waltzed too near a naked flame; your hair did singe
Your dress ignited too
I always seem to injure you
A toast with French champagne:
The cork knocked out your two front tee-eeth
The ice sculpture of you I carved:
It fellpinned you underneath
I'm sorry, honey!
I may be romantic, but I'm such a putz
I didn't know those chocolates were filled with nuts
Coz you were allergic, your face went grey
I guess I won't be cooking you that beef satay
I do not have a clue
Enamoured, but I injure you
[INSTRUMENTAL]
Last night, while making love
I stroked your hair and kissed your fa-ace
We tried some Kama Sutra moves;
And now you're in a neck brace
A-whoopsadaisy!
I'm surprised we're still together; I'll admit
That when we go on dates I take a first aid kit
You know that I love yalet's marry soon!
I'll book a bed in ER for our honeymoon
My darling, please don't sue
I never mean to injure you!
I hope you're well insured
I always seem to injure you
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User Comments Follow...
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I didn't know you were dating Arwen! LOL, great job!
I also noticed the Arwenesque idiom... this also made me think of Tom Leher's "Masochism Tango". Funny stuff.
Fabulous from start to finish...but "A-whoopsadaisy!" was beyond inspired! WON-derful!!!
And I don't know what the other boys are talking about...this reminded me NOTHING of myself...; )
And I don't know what the other boys are talking about...this reminded me NOTHING of myself...; )
i hurt myself laughing
Kristof, you're a master in putting down slapstick in words! 5s
TMGLTMSIOMO. The Kama Sutra moves line was one of my favorites here.
Thanks, all!
Jeff: You didn't? We've been dating in the back of ambulances for some time now...:-D
Rex: Don't know much about Tom Lehrer. I'll have to check him out. Thanks
Arwen: And I honestly didn't intend to base this on you either. But...when I saw the finished product...;-) Cheers, gorgeous!
Alvin: I'm sorry...your insurance probably doesn't cover parody-related contusions! Thanks, mate
YAD: much appreciated. I must admit, I do love slapping a stick from time to time. ;-)
Rick: TMGLTMSIOMO?? TYVMFYCs!!
Jeff: You didn't? We've been dating in the back of ambulances for some time now...:-D
Rex: Don't know much about Tom Lehrer. I'll have to check him out. Thanks
Arwen: And I honestly didn't intend to base this on you either. But...when I saw the finished product...;-) Cheers, gorgeous!
Alvin: I'm sorry...your insurance probably doesn't cover parody-related contusions! Thanks, mate
YAD: much appreciated. I must admit, I do love slapping a stick from time to time. ;-)
Rick: TMGLTMSIOMO?? TYVMFYCs!!
You seem to be accident prone...but not with parodies...great work..fives
What's next Kristof... Me So Klutzy?
fell on the floor laughing over this one! 555
Priceless! Kristofesque. I echo Rick's TMGLTMSIOMO with "I'll book a bed in ER for our honeymoon" but the "I'm sorry, honey" and "a-whoopsadaisy" were perfect too - and gee, you ironed out any threats of pacing ambiguity with this one - very very funny - 555
LOL....great lines, Kristof. I see only good stuff in your parody. 5's
In a word: great!
Well, I would third the TMGLTMSIOMO except I am at a loss to figure out what the hell SIOMO means ATM so I'll just have to do the TMGLTM part. And 5s.
Must admit I DKOS. But I will admit that this is up to your usual standards. Which is higher than most of us will ever reach. Terriffic stuff, Kristof! 555
Sorry, Kristof. TMGLTMSIOMO = too many good lines to mention so, I'll only mention one.
AFW: Yeah, my life's one big medical bill.;-) Thanks
Matthias: Good idea!
Carol: You really ought to take more care when parody reading! Cheers
Stu: As always, your support's much appreciated, mate!
Adagio: Thanks alot, sweetie
John: In two words: bless you!
Red Ant: SIOMO...So I'll Only Mention One (I think..) Cheers, twice!
Dee: I'm SURE you'd know the OS if you heard it...it's one of those classics that people forget they know. If not; try to get yourself a copy- it's fab! Cheers, dude
Matthias: Good idea!
Carol: You really ought to take more care when parody reading! Cheers
Stu: As always, your support's much appreciated, mate!
Adagio: Thanks alot, sweetie
John: In two words: bless you!
Red Ant: SIOMO...So I'll Only Mention One (I think..) Cheers, twice!
Dee: I'm SURE you'd know the OS if you heard it...it's one of those classics that people forget they know. If not; try to get yourself a copy- it's fab! Cheers, dude
(SOTM06) Already voted and commented...still funny.
[SOTM] DKTOS Well enough to vote, but it was really funny. Good job!
[SOTM] Very funny. I loved the way you said that the cork knocked out her two front teeth. Hilarious.
(SOTM) Made me commence to giggle, then fall off my chair. You'll hear from my lawyers...until then...555
(SOTM)I was eating lunch when I re-read this and "I'll book a bed in ER for our honeymoon" almost made me choke on my beef satay.
Perfectly executed concept and gags. This theme is what I was trying to do pull off in my Valentine's parody http://www.amiright.com/parody/2000s/britneyspears281.shtml but of course, yours in infinitely better. I even slightly KTOS! 555
Amazingly good, even for your high standards, K. And very consistent all the way through.
I love Dusty Springfield. I love the OS. I even love the Bay City Rollers cover.
And I love this parody too. Kristof meets Arwen. TMGLTMSIOM3: "Your dress ignited too," "A-whoopsadaisy!" and, of most of all, the ER bit.
And I love this parody too. Kristof meets Arwen. TMGLTMSIOM3: "Your dress ignited too," "A-whoopsadaisy!" and, of most of all, the ER bit.
SOTM - Too bad for you that December was the month Spaff put up what's possibly the best parody ever, I saved it for last hoping it would match it, but I'm sad too say that this will only go as numero deuce and the first loser on my list. (Unless someone outside the dynamic duo of you two sends me some bribe money RSN). :-)
SOTM - It pains me to say it, but I tripped over your 5's. I hope you're not sore.
(SOTM) - already slavishly praised this one, but here's another fave line: "That when we go on dates I take a first aid kit" - and the use of "Enamoured" was pacing gold too
(SOTM) What left to say besides repeating "TMGLTM"? I do have a question though for anyone who knows: Is this the same song Hootie and the Blowfish did?.
(SOTM) GET THIS RECORDED ASAP!!!!!!!!!!!! Lovesd it!! 555!!
(SOTM) I laughed SO hard while reading this! I agree with Jack, you HAVE to record this!
(SOTM) Don't injure yourself clambering over the mountain of 5s that's piling up all over this parody!
What everyone else said, with the TMGLTM and the 555 and whatnot. All right, I do have to single out the "A-whoopsadaisy" part; that was awesome. And for Red Ant: No, this is a totally different song from that Hootie one.
(SOTM) I was gonna vote on this before, but I was laughing so hard I fell off my chair. 555's
SOTM: Still great...see above!
(SOTM) So true, so true, 5s
(SOTM) LOL!! What else can I say?
(SOTM) How did I miss this the first time? Fantastic, one of your best!
They say you always hurt the one you love; didjn't know they meant it literally.... Absolutely love Dusty and the OS; ingenious and perfectly executed parody. Wish I'd found it sooner. 555555555555555555
(soty 05) This was a favorite.
(2005 SOTY) See above twice, and thanks Claude for answering that question.
Excellent from start to finish - the ER honeymoon was my fave.
I'm still enamoured with this one, Overlord Kristof.
Second Place
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