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Song Parodies -> "The Lend"

Original Song Title:

"The End"

Original Performer:


Parody Song Title:

"The Lend"

Parody Written by:

John A. Barry

The Lyrics

This is the lend, usury’s end.
This is the lend, your loan-shark friend, the lend.
There’s a repayment plan, the lend.
“You’d better make it, man!” The lend.
“No safety will you find,” the lend,
“If you don’t pay it back on time, my friend!”

It’s five figures that you see,
The vigs’ haunting your spree…
desperately you need to repay this, and
you’re a desperate man.

Borrowed some dough an’ filled pockets with gain:
It’s close to a million, that’s plain.
They will kill you or cause pain…
waiting is your bummer bane.

There’s danger that’s worse than a frown.
Ride the big highway—take off!
Nearly, you owe a gold mine—
ride the highway, get way out.

Ride or quake, ride or break.
Do not fake the payment. Haste away.
Don’t take too long; do not while
time away.
They’ll scold, then take a worse toll.

They’ll mess with your vest;
they’ll press on your chest,
then sneer as you take last breath.

You, dude, must
haul ass; they’ll bust
your cute butt
with savage lust.
Violence is for them a must.

The vigorish on the loan’s on—
this ain’t no loot pawn.
You gotta face it: there ain’t no gallantry;
this is not a shopping mall.
You’re sensing your doom if the vigorish is empty.
Pay it you had better, brother, or bled be,
or legs smashed by a maul.
You cannot cry poor…
maybe take a ride?
Farther out from where they might kill you.
Mothers are these dudes.

They’ll lay waste to you…you don’t pay up,
they’ll make paste of you…you don’t pay up.
They’ll lay waste to you, so best pay up.
Or get your ass onto a Greyhound bus,
a Greyhound bus….
get on, yeah!

Slug, slug, slug…!
Punch, punch, punch…!
Kill, kill, kill.

That was your end…
mooched on the lend.
That was the end…
should not take lends, dead friend.

Hurt was transitory;
you weathered fecklessly.
The lending side should be your site;
to borrow should be out of sight.
Don’t borrow, lend.

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