Here's my story: 1202,
The number on my prison blues
Must watch out or I'll be run down
By Stu, who thinks I wear a gown.

"Hey, Stu, no-o-o-o-o,
"Hey, Stu, no-o-o-o-o,
"Hey, Stu, no-o-o-o-NO!
Arrggghhhh!

I learned on the day that my term did start
That Stu looked for a "bitch" with an open heart.
My cellmates said, "Buddy, we're warning you:
Keep away from Reacharound Stu.

"He's not too interested in your face,
His criminal mind's on another place,
Oh, he'll give you a quid pro quo, it's true,
But keep away from Reacharound Stu.

"Yeah, his fingers travel around
While he loves you and thinks of gowns.
Your peephole, though, is his true prize--
Don't put out like other guys.

"He's not oral, but the glory hole is where he goes--
Take it from Joe, who so sorely knows.
When you shower go with a big crew. . .
Keep you away from Reacharound Stu.

"His fingers are navel-bound,
While he loves you, he drops them down.
He'll peak before you get your prize.
Then put moves on other guys.

"He's not oral, but the glory hole is where he goes--
Take it from Moe, who so sorely knows.
Though he's the warden, we're warning you:
Keep away from Reacharound Stu."