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Song Parodies -> "Make The World Go Our Way (Islam)"

Original Song Title:

"Make The World Go Away"

Original Performer:

Dean Martin

Parody Song Title:

"Make The World Go Our Way (Islam)"

Parody Written by:

Barry J. Mitchel

The Lyrics

U.S. Secretary of State John Kerry opined that recent kidnappings and violence in Nigeria et alia are responses to poverty. Perhaps he's right -- if poverty is an acronym for "Plainly, Our Vestigial Eastern Religion Trumps Yours." TOS reads like a plea by Atlas, before he shrugged.
Break the world, blow't away;
Set bombs off, sly, bolder.
Faithful, bring Mohammed's way;
Remake the world as we slay.

Do you remember "Jesu loved me"
Before Allah decreed the way?
It's new truth, men who'd live free:
Forsake this world, go away.

Break the world, blow't away;
Set bombs off, sly, bolder.
Faithful, bring Mohammed's way;
Remake the world as we slay.

I'm sorry if I hurt few;
I'll shake all up (gay, bi, straight).
Just say you love Allah (you Jews too)
And wake to World Caliphate.

Break the world, blow't away;
Set bombs off, sly, bolder.
Faithful, bring Mohammed's way;
Remake the world as we slay.

Pray while prone five times each day;
We'll make the world go our way.

When will political leaders recognize and stop appeasing and denying this existential threat?

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Pacing: 3.4
How Funny: 3.4
Overall Rating: 3.4

Total Votes: 5

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User Comments

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Anon - May 14, 2014 - Report this comment
Islam is hardly vestigial. At their cores, all old-time religions require unswerving, militant belief in the truth of their Gods, and Christianity with its missionary colonialism and murder of Dr. Slepian; and Hindu, with its massacres of Muslims, are prime examples. And as Tom Lehrer said, "everybody hates the Jews." Imagine all the people -- and no religion, too. Your polemic is not helpful.
Barry J. Mitchel - May 14, 2014 - Report this comment
Anon: If you don't agree with "Vestigial", try "Virtuous"; it's what Muslims believe.

To avoid repetition, change the third and fifth stanzas to:

Take school girl, stow'r away;
Get some loft, hold her.
Make her linger where you say,
And read the Koran ev'ry day.

Take school girl, show'r our way;
Let us often scold her.
Take her singleness away;
And make the girl know: don't stray.
Callmelennie - May 14, 2014 - Report this comment
If Hindus massacred Muslims, it just might have been in retaliation for the 60 to 80 million Hindus killed during the 300 years or so that The Moghuls ruled over India. So, yeah -- nice try at historical inversion, Anon ..... And there is only one religion that states that all sins are instantly forgiven and that you will be spared a terrifying ordeal in the afterlife (which is the fate of all other Muslims) PROVIDED you die in a war to advance the interests of Islam ..... And no other religion is so primitive and blatantly militaristic that it tells adolescent boys that they will be rewarded with an eternity of sex with 72 celestial hump-creatures (al houri) the very instant they are killed in a religious war. So, nice try with the "all religions are equally violent" trope
Other Anon - May 14, 2014 - Report this comment
You'll have to pardon Anon there, Callmelennie. He lost relatives in a USSR gulag.

Yeah, they fell right out of that guard tower...
Patrick - May 14, 2014 - Report this comment
I certainly hope the kidnapped girls will be released, preferably by a commando team that slaughters the scum who took them.
Anon #3 - May 14, 2014 - Report this comment
I agree with Anon. This parody is an undeserved rebuke of all Muslims for the wretched actions of a small percentage of murderous monsters. Consider this excerpt from the parody:

Faithful, bring Mohammed's way;
Remake the world as we slay.
Pray while prone five times each day;
We'll make the world go our way.

The parody is ill-tempered in this way throughout, especially with the replacements to the third and fifth stanzas. What good does this do? It helps to create stereotypes, and we all know to what evil that leads.

CML: IF Hindus massacred Muslims...? That's like saying I apologize if I offended anybody. This is the lede of a March 1, 2002 story in the N.Y. Times:

"Hindu mobs rampaged through this city in western India on Thursday, killing more than 60 people as they burned Muslims alive in their homes and set fire to Muslim-owned restaurants, shops, cars and apartments.

"The religious violence, the most serious India has experienced in years, was retaliation for a Muslim mob's attack Wednesday on a trainload of Hindu fundamentalists in which 58 people were burned to death in a single car. Most were women and children."

It's time to stop counting burnt bodies on either side. The parody asks, "Do you remember 'Jesu loved me'"? If we are made in God's image, then we were made to love, not hate. That's a tall order, but we can make a start by refraining from hate parodies and comments.

I can't say anything about comparative violence of religions, but I have seen and heard news films of the Atlantic Conference where FDR and Winnie were serenaded with "Onward, Christian Soldiers."
All U Need Is Love - May 14, 2014 - Report this comment
Kill your television now! Islam is no worse a religion than any other one. Every religion has it's true practitioners AND fanatics. Christian fanatics have been a major scourge in America, especially during the Dumbya DICKtatorship. The crap, abuses and lies of the money-stealing Iraq War is a major disgrace. One of the last things Pope John Paul II did in his life was apologize to Islamic leaders for the evils and abominations committed against Muslims during the Crusades. Moderate Muslims were OK with that. Muslim fundamentalists didn't accept the olive branch. Fundies never do, everything they do is motivated by hate. If Jesus Christ were to return today fundies of all religions would have Him beat up and arrested. Unfortunately religion is just a T-shirt for many people and there's a strong holier-than-thou arrogance around. It's time to stop the madness and stop fueling the fires with these stupid ignorant "parodies" that propagate stereotypes.
Apparently, Love Just Ain't Enough - May 14, 2014 - Report this comment
Well, I'd have to say while Islam IS the worst religion in the world, it's no worse a religion than Leftism, since both religions advocate for "love" and "charity" at the point of a gun, murderous hatred for George W. Bush and anyone else who dares liberate people from Islamic and Marxist despotism, and censorship of all who disagree with them. You have to remember, though: it's only the 99.999999999% of adherents to each of these religions that are extremists who do all this hateful violent stuff that makes the more moderate and peaceable 0.000000001% look bad.
@ Apparently, Love Just Ain't Enough - May 15, 2014 - Report this comment
I have a bet going, which involves taking the biggest schmuck to dinner. With you as my schmuck, I'd be the winner.
Patrick - May 15, 2014 - Report this comment
Look up the original meaning of "schmuck". Afraid I won't be competing in your dinner give-away.
@ Apparently, Love Just Ain't Enough - May 15, 2014 - Report this comment
Patrick: I looked up the origin of the word. Oy vey! And it was used in the title of a movie yet! O.K., just so you'll compete we'll have the guy who comes with the littlest schmuck win. Maybe I should rephrase that...

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