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Song Parodies -> "Gas Station Bathroom"

Original Song Title:

"White Room"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Cream

Parody Song Title:

"Gas Station Bathroom"

Parody Written by:

Paul Robinson

The Lyrics

Ever been on the road and had to use the bathroom at a Gas Station?

In the restroom when I stopped at a gas station
Filthy toilets, no sh*t paper, used my crossword
Whole place smelled bad, saw smeared feces, on the sink top
The clerk smiled, then spoke gibberish at my complaint

I'll crap in this place 'cause I don't have much choice
I'll hold my nose and pretend that I'm somewhere else

Saw some strange guy with a nose ring at that station
Was approached by homeless vagrant, "Wash your windows?"
I said "No thanks, I'm just here to use the bathroom"
"You'll be sorry" said the vagrant; then he farted

I gasped and went "phew" as that fart wafted by
Tried not to puke as that vagrant crapped on himself

(Instrumental break)

This gas station for some reason draws a weird crowd
Its location is near downtown and it's rotten
Teen-age hoodlums, stoned-out bikers hang around there
They stared at me through my windows; now I'm frightened

I'm leaving this place just as soon as I can
I won't be back, freaks can have this place for themselves

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 4

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 0
 0
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
 0
 
 4   0
 0
 0
 
 5   4
 4
 4
 

User Comments

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Paul Robinson - June 01, 2004 - Report this comment
Please vote and comment on THIS version. This parody was double posted today. Thanks, Paul - As I noted on the duplicate version (and shouldn't have), this is my 100th post on amiright.
John Barry - June 01, 2004 - Report this comment
Dead-on parody; dead-on description.
Paul Robinson - June 01, 2004 - Report this comment
Thanks, John. I sure saw some funky ones on my trip up to Northern California in January this year (and on the way back, too, of course). GAG!
Johnny D - June 01, 2004 - Report this comment
This parody forced me to actually laugh out loud - for real - here at my desk! Paul, this is incredible - hilarious and brilliant! 555 without a stinkin' doubt!
Paul Robinson - June 01, 2004 - Report this comment
Thank you, Johnny D! Yeah, when I was pacing it out to the CD track I was cracking up.
Jack Wilson - June 01, 2004 - Report this comment
Great job! 555!
Rick D - June 01, 2004 - Report this comment
Yep, you proved it. You live in the LA area.
Kristof Robertson - June 01, 2004 - Report this comment
Such a sweet guy, gone so wrong.....555 :-)
Paul Robinson - June 01, 2004 - Report this comment
Jack W and Rick D - Thanks! Hey, Rick - I ran into most of these biology experiments on the road up North and back. In fact the worst was about 90 or 100 miles South of San Jose. I don't remember the town but I remember I had to go out to my car and get paper towels and kleenex before I could use the can. Had to wash the seat first and the kleenex was my T.P. But I will admit that L.A. certainly has more than it's share of disgusting Gas Station Bathrooms.
Kristof Robertson - June 01, 2004 - Report this comment
Congrats on reaching 100...you don't look a day over 87...:-)
Johnny D - June 01, 2004 - Report this comment
Hey, that's right - kudos on the big C, Paul!
Paul Robinson - June 01, 2004 - Report this comment
Kristof, Thanks...you know, I don't feel a day over 87, either. Johnny D - Thanks to you, too. Wouldn't have made 100 without you ( I can think of at least two that I never would have got posted, at least...heh).
Agrimorfee - June 01, 2004 - Report this comment
Robinson is GOD! 555
Paul Robinson - June 01, 2004 - Report this comment
Agrimorfee - Oh, my...No...couldn't be...if I was everything would have to be a whole lot easier to do...wouldn't it? Thanks!
Arwen - June 01, 2004 - Report this comment
Nice work, Paul! 555...
Billy Florio - June 01, 2004 - Report this comment
Perfect description of a gas station bathroom.....good job
Royce Miller - June 01, 2004 - Report this comment
a bad day at Black Rock? but a good parody
Paul Robinson - June 01, 2004 - Report this comment
Arwen, Billy F. and Royce - Thanks!
Chris Bodily TM - June 01, 2004 - Report this comment
Brilliant, just brilliant! I loved the description of the bathroom and laughed at the dirty humor you used in it. If Eric Clapton were reading this parody right now, he'd loathe it. 5's to you, Mr. Robinson.
Paul Robinson - June 01, 2004 - Report this comment
Thanks, Chris B.
alvin rhodes - June 01, 2004 - Report this comment
congrats on hitting the century mark...this truly is a chilling scenario.. 5s
Johnny D - June 01, 2004 - Report this comment
This parody deserves a LOT more votes!
Paul Robinson - June 01, 2004 - Report this comment
Alvin - Thanks! Johnny D - Double Thanks!!!!! I'm pleased as punch that you would come over here and say that (FYI - Former Vice-President and one-time Senator Hubert Humphrey used to say that a lot and yes, people made fun of him over it).
Johnny D - June 01, 2004 - Report this comment
Paul, I'm sitting at home and I just finished reading this parody again - and this time, I sang it out loud to the original song's music - and I freakin' laughed out loud! The pacing of this parody flows astonishingly smoothly in-synch with that of the original song, and your imagery flows right along with it. I say again, very, very well done.
Paul Robinson - June 01, 2004 - Report this comment
Johnny D - Thanks! I was hoping that other people would enjoy it as much as I did. You know, except for some politically pointed pieces I almost never hold anything up once it's finished, but I held this one a day because I didn't know if many folks would be on site on the Holiday. I happened to show it to a few friends on Sunday and they ALl laughed out loud, including some who don't do a whole lot of laughing in the first place. Geez, even my older brother, Pete laughed out loud and he usually doesn't think anybody is funny except him. And I must admit, I've played & sang to the CD track a number of times since submitting it and I keep smiling and cracking up each time. I'll bet the neighbors downstairs are probably getting tired of it by now. You know, I saw a comment on your "Gangplank to Heaven" number today and revisited it. Arrhh! me timbers are all aquiver from the laughter...
Mari D - June 01, 2004 - Report this comment
Thanks, Paul, for making me laugh out loud at work on a stressful day! And you have 100 parodies! Holy crap! Congrats!
Paul Robinson - June 01, 2004 - Report this comment
Mari D - You're welcome! Glad you enjoyed it. Good thing I made some people laugh with this parody 'cause I sure pissed someone off with some comments I made earlier. Just made a lengthy reply explaining why I don't think I'm really the most heartless bastard in the world. I really don't think I'm even in the top 10, but I'm not sure the intended reader will be in any way mollified. Hey, I know...think I'll pop "White Room" on the CD and do a little sing-along with it. I don't think my downstairs neighbors have heard my version enough to fully appreciate it yet. I'll take care of that right away...
Melhi - June 01, 2004 - Report this comment
Love it, Paul! Great job!
Paul Robinson - June 01, 2004 - Report this comment
Thanks, Melhi! Glad you liked it.
Adagio - June 07, 2004 - Report this comment
(ABC) Really good job, Paul! 5's
Melhi - June 07, 2004 - Report this comment
*GGG* (Big grins, giggles & guffaws)
Paul Robinson - June 07, 2004 - Report this comment
Adadio & Melhi - Thanks!
Johnny D - June 09, 2004 - Report this comment
(ABC) Ask Paul for the restroom key, and then see above!
Meriadoc - June 09, 2004 - Report this comment
This is why you should always carry a cup with you in the car! ;-) I will reserve my vote for when I do the ABC voting. Just catching up with the last week's worth right now...
Jack Wilson - June 10, 2004 - Report this comment
(ABC) See above
Paul Robinson - June 10, 2004 - Report this comment
Johnny D - You don't NEED no stinking key for these places. When the inside is totally and entirely gross and disgusting there's a good chance that none of the locks work and that the door to the toilet stall either won't close or is just plain completely missing. I mean, what good would it be to have someone forced by circumstances to take a dump in the most disgusting bathroom in America if they wouldn't also be subjected to the additional humiliation of the possibility of someone walking in on them while they were trying to do it. Thanks Mer & Jack, too.
Spaff.com - June 10, 2004 - Report this comment
I'm not much of a fan of #2 humor, P-Rob, but I always seem to find myself making exceptions for yours. That vagrant verse is classic. Nice description of the least-white room there is.
Johnny D - June 10, 2004 - Report this comment
Yup, TMS is right, the vagrant verse gave me the biggest laugh.
Paul Robinson - June 10, 2004 - Report this comment
Spaff - Thanks! The "vagrant" verse was also my personal favorite. Initially I didn't have him crapping on himself in the chorus. I think I had him Peeing on himself...the change was an improvement, for sure. Thanks again, JD!
Claude Prez - June 11, 2004 - Report this comment
I told you you'd be sorry. But I'm not a "homeless vagrant"; I'm a "residence-impaired non-stationary". Seriously, very very good.
Paul Robinson - June 11, 2004 - Report this comment
Thanks, Claude, 'preciate it.
neminem - June 12, 2004 - Report this comment
That was perfectly brilliant. 5'd.
Meriadoc - June 12, 2004 - Report this comment
(ABC) I liked the crossword part the best. :-)
Paul Robinson - June 13, 2004 - Report this comment
neminem and mer - many thanks ~ mer ~ glad you liked that. I was torn between using "crossword" , "map guide" or "hankie" and decided I liked "crossword" the best (I polled all my personalities - "map guide" finished 2nd.)
Jeff Reuben - June 13, 2004 - Report this comment
Lots of bathroom humor this round =)
Paul Robinson - June 14, 2004 - Report this comment
Thanks for looking in, Jeff.
martha - June 15, 2004 - Report this comment
100 parodies .. fantastic Paul...your lyric is very pungent!
Paul Robinson - June 15, 2004 - Report this comment
Martha - Thank you very much!
2nz - June 27, 2004 - Report this comment
(late abc's comment) Now ain't this some $h!t. I should have mentioned earlier that if we were allowed three choices instead of one for abc, you'd definitely have been on mine. While I shy away from toilet humor for several reasons, the great pacing and, if you'll pardon me, 'flow' of this parody are undeniable. Great work, Paul.
Paul Robinson - June 29, 2004 - Report this comment
2nz - Thanks aplenty! I've got some catching up to do on some earlier (ABC) rounds and I apologize for letting that happen. I'm probably disqualified for a while and that's OK. But I will catch up on those parodies fairly soon anyway, since those folks took the time to look at mine.
Red Ant - September 19, 2005 - Report this comment
Ah, an OS and subject I know well, and so "do" you. Gas station bathrooms are disgusting in every way.
Chris Holder - October 22, 2005 - Report this comment
Dear God that was Funny! Your lyrics and descriptions were so true , and graphically hilarious! This one might be the funniest parody i've read on this site! The part about the vagrants fart wafting by...( He he Ha Ha ) O man , that was good.
Paul Robinson - November 02, 2005 - Report this comment
Chris Holder...Thank you Much! It's definitely one of my favorites of what I have written to date ~ ~ ~ Red Ant, missed your September comment...Thanks!

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