I'm gonna bake muffins for lunch
And punch it up with several shots of rum punch.
For fiber I'm gonna use oats that are rolled.
Bakin' is my world, and my donuts are holed.

I tell you nothin' says lovin'
Like somethin' from the oven.
I hate Jell-o,
I'm a bakin' fellow.
So please stow all the knockwurst and the meat--
My meringue's a treat.
Stow the knockwurst and the meat.

I don't need grills;
I've got free will.
I think lunch meat is taboo.

I'm bakin' a delicious pie.
It's so mellow and smoooooth
And I won't fry.

Those sumptuous cakes and pies, they cook so fine.
When you taste my filo leaves,
Get ready to dine!

Because nothin' says lovin'
Like somethin' from the oven.
I roll sweet dough;
Did you taste my filo?
And you know,
I knock eggs apart and beat--
My meringue's a treat.
I knock eggs apart and beat.

Yeah, all my neighbors say that my bakin's good.
They smell it waftin' out from my oven's hood.
Tastes so fine--
They get piebites when then they dine.
I bake with palm leaves in Maui,
And they say, "Da kine!"

Baklava at luncheon
And I need a truncheon. . .
Trounce those fellows
Ravaging my filo,
Leafy dough,
And I knock them off their feet--
Like eggs whites, they're beat.
And I knock them to defeat.

She says, "You, go girl!"
The big O girl,
She's a known lover of food,
Baked. She has it on her show, a meal. . .
Loves my egg whites:
"Meringue!! Meringue!!!!"