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Song Parodies -> "Sexist Racist Classist Ageist Homophobic Ignoramus"

Original Song Title:

"Itsy Bitsy Teenie Weenie Yellow Polka Dot Bikini"

Original Performer:

Brian Hyland

Parody Song Title:

"Sexist Racist Classist Ageist Homophobic Ignoramus"

Parody Written by:

Spaff.com

The Lyrics

I'm so ashamed that I called you a [censored]
It's a slur that I never should use
I would deny that I called you a [censored]
But the clip is all over the news

(Two, three, four - What are people angry for?)

'Cause I'm a
Sexist racist classist ageist homophobic ignoramus
Though I've stopped saying [censored] out loud
A sexist racist classist ageist homophobic ignoramus
If it slipped out, I must have been plowed

(Four, three, two - Tell them you were sniffing glue)

I am NOT preju-dissed against [censored]s
There are [censored]s that live on my street
In fact, some of my best friends are [censored]s
They are almost like us, and that's sweet

(Three, four, five - It's okay if they're alive)

I'm not a
Sexist racist classist ageist homophobic ignoramus
I say be what you claim you must be
I'm NOT a racist classist ageist homophobic ignoramus
Just don't be it - where I have to see

(Two, three, four - Stay inside and shut the door)

I should go meet with the head of the [censored]s
And make the [censored] community see
I've got nothing but love for the [censored]s
No one puts up with [censored]s like me

(Thirty, forty, fifty - You're so tolerant it's nifty)

I'm not a
Sexist racist classist ageist homophobic ignoramus
Please forgive me; I spoke out of place
A sexist racist classist ageist homophobic ignoramus
Now you [censored]s, get out of my face!

(Let your agent make a statement)
(Let the statement blame the gin)
(Let the gin send you to rehab)
Now the healing can begin!
(c) 2007+ Spaffist

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.6
How Funny: 4.4
Overall Rating: 4.4

Total Votes: 26

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   2
 4
 4
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   1
 0
 0
 
 4   1
 0
 0
 
 5   22
 22
 22
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Matthias - January 22, 2007 - Report this comment
Spaff you're such a [censored], but you're one [censored] of a [censored]!!! Great [censored] Job!!!
Jack Wilson - January 22, 2007 - Report this comment
{censored}HILARIOUS!!! 555
alvin rhodes - January 22, 2007 - Report this comment
!@#$%^ funny
Michael Pacholek - January 22, 2007 - Report this comment
Spaff, you magnificent b@$+@rd, I read your parody! Parody of the year! At least the title of the year! OK, the year's only three weeks old, but still, you're a genius! Or are we discriminating against geniuses this year? (No, that was 2000 and 2004.)
Below Average Dave - January 22, 2007 - Report this comment
Spaff? Is this one recorded? It's my fav so far by you. . .and I'd like to hear it if you have recorded it.
Steve K. - January 22, 2007 - Report this comment
Dave - I believe that Robert Lund has recorded many of Spaff's parodies. Of course, I have my doubts about whether Spaff and Lund are two different people.
Joel Martinez - January 22, 2007 - Report this comment
If this is not recorded,someone please hire a sniper to kill me cause this is FUNNY!555
Below Average Dave - January 22, 2007 - Report this comment
Oh, thanks Steve, I kinda assumed they were the same.
Phil Alexander - January 22, 2007 - Report this comment
Is this about the current Big Brother brouhaha over this side of the pond? If not, it's beautifully coincidentally topical :-)
Stephen Harrington - January 22, 2007 - Report this comment
555, I probably don't want to know the censored word was....
PMS - January 22, 2007 - Report this comment
Best stab at intolerance I have ever seen!
Spaff.com - January 23, 2007 - Report this comment
Thanx, Matthias & Jack & alvin. It's always nice to get comments from [censored]s like you.

Michael: Why, you're quite m@gn
Spaff.com - January 23, 2007 - Report this comment
Wow - the comment filter obviously didn't want me to call Michael magnificent. It must be Republican. Let's try this again....

Michael: Why, you're quite m@gn!f!(en+ yourself.

Dave & Steve & Joel: Thanx for the vote of confidence, and beware of snipers. I sent the lyrics to Robert the same time I submitted them here; we'll see if he has the time and inclination to record this. I know it may seem like he's just an imaginary friend, but I've met the guy and I'm convinced he's real. As is he.

Phil: Over there you've got Jade Goody; over here we've got Mel Gibson, Michael Richards, and Isaiah Washington. I told Jack Wilson a while back that I was resisting writing anything about the Michael Richards thing, but with similar episodes following in rapid succession, I lost my resistance. This is a tribute to the lot of 'em.

Stephen: Pick the worst epithet you can think of, fill in all the blanks with it, then sing it out loud. At work.

PMS: In reply, I was going to make a witty joke about stabbing, but I got nothin'.
Michael Pacholek - January 23, 2007 - Report this comment
Don't worry, Spaff. If you can't call me "magnificent," I'm sure there's some other words you could use. "Superb" comes to mind. And I don't mind at all sharing such descriptions with you and your work.
Ravyn Rant - January 23, 2007 - Report this comment
Abso-[censored!]-lutely brilliant. The last few lines were perfect.
Spaff.com - January 23, 2007 - Report this comment
Michaelopedia: And "humble." Don't forget "humble."

Ravyn: Just the last few lines?! Heh heh. Thank you and your peeps.
Norman Wanman - January 24, 2007 - Report this comment
Brilliant! Bloody [censored] brilliant! Are you sure Kramer (Michael Richards) is not singing this now?
Meriadoc - January 26, 2007 - Report this comment
Great one! (At least after I stopped trying to sing it to Supercalifragilisticexpealidocious.... :-P )
Tommy Turtle - January 30, 2007 - Report this comment
You got something against reptiles, you speciesist humancentric m*****f*****?
j/k - This was great, tough OS, LOL, and the 'tweenline variations were "nifty" - I was gonna cite the "nifty" one that I really liked, but didn't want to get in trouble for plagiarizing lol. 555
Spaff.com - February 03, 2007 - Report this comment
Norman: He's probably singing "Poor Poor Pitiful Me."

Smeagol: I had that same problem while I was writing it. Seriously. Damn that Julie Andrews.

Tommy: OK, I'll admit to a bit of Testudinophobia, but I'm going into rehab. That oughtta fix it.
HERE'S ROBERT LUND'S RECORDING - February 11, 2007 - Report this comment
www.spaff.com/poesy/sexist.html
Jack Wilson - February 18, 2007 - Report this comment
Awesome recording!
The Charnstar - March 19, 2007 - Report this comment
LOL! HILARIOUS! LOVE IT!
Rick C - April 14, 2007 - Report this comment
Well, it took a few months for me to notice this little gem but, I'm glad I did! Spaff, your parody genius and Robert's musical mastery are a one-two combination that can't be beat. Kudos to you both!
Spaff.com - August 18, 2007 - Report this comment
Belated thanx, Jackie & Charnstar. And Rick: I keep waiting for those Garageband idiots to give you and Stu's song its deserved props. The place is teeming with disgruntled undiscovereds who take out their frustration on others.
Christopher - March 09, 2012 - Report this comment
I'm a liberalistic McCarthy-istic! Cacophonous Marxist-loving Commie! .

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