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Song Parodies -> "Shelter From the Porn"

Original Song Title:

"Shelter From the Storm"

Original Performer:

Bob Dylan

Parody Song Title:

"Shelter From the Porn"

Parody Written by:

Rick Duncan

The Lyrics

The word as a theme again
I was watching flicks on "Lifetime", women bashing men
My stoned-ness was a virtue, for T.V. sucked again
I got up from the sofa bed, crammed into my dorm
Turn off that crap, discovered--- Shelter from the porn

And if I watch the thing again, you can bet your ass
I'll just watch A&E there, or a-something else with class
In a world of Jerry S. where hookers are the norm
I'm turning off the boob tube---Sheltered from the porn

Not a word in any sitcom, is remotely humorous
And people on the "real" shows do nothing but yell and cuss
My time might be better spent if I practiced the french horn
I'm turning off "Fear Factor"---Sheltered from the porn

I was burned out from the talk shows, buried in the yak
Poisoned by the re-runs, I'd seen "em ten years back
Needed some new diversion, social life forlorn
It's about that time to be---Sheltered from the porn

Suddenly I turned it off, I went out in the air
I looked up at the cloudy mists, why it's a world out there
It then dawned on me so peacefully, that I could be reborn
The media let me out---Sheltered from the porn

Now I went out for dinner, worked on social skills
Did not watch television, found some newer thrills
Just to think it all began, when my T.V. Guide got torn
Now I'm a better person---Sheltered from the porn

Well, to make a long story shorter, I made every minute more
I did a lot of drugs and booze, and every night a whore
And my one-eyed baby-maker, was getting pretty worn
At least my set had freed me---Shelter from that porn

And sometimes when I awaken, sleeping on a bench
And women walk across the street, to avoid the stench
Once, that television guided me, now my thoughts I cannot form
And here I thought that I was ---Sheltered from the porn

In a little hilltop graveyard I lie here in repose
I tried to run from evil, but it just grabbed my toes
And on my little patch of dirt, a dog relieves each morn
I guess there really isn't---Shelter from the porn

Well, the lesson here I've learned way too late, that it's good to burn up time
Guess my life of lethargy wasn't as bad as wine
If I could only turn back the clock, I would watch T.V all morn
Give up, there's no achieving---Shelter from the porn


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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 17

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 0
 0
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
 0
 
 4   0
 0
 0
 
 5   17
 17
 17
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Johnny D - September 26, 2005 - Report this comment
I recommend porn chips and salsa.
Rick C - September 26, 2005 - Report this comment
Great job on a great OS...555
Paul Robinson - September 26, 2005 - Report this comment
Nice job, Rick...good to see you take a solid whack at this subject matter ~ ~ ~
Michael Pacholek - September 26, 2005 - Report this comment
A stroke of genius.
Rick D - September 26, 2005 - Report this comment
Thanks guys. Dylan is so wordy, that he takes you to strange places when you try come up with enough ideas for a long song.
carol - September 26, 2005 - Report this comment
May I offer you porn on the rocks to go with the three 5's?
Red Ant - September 26, 2005 - Report this comment
DKTOS but a funny parody with a lot of effort here Rick.

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