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Song Parodies -> "Stools on the Hill"

Original Song Title:

"Fool on the Hil"

Original Performer:


Parody Song Title:

"Stools on the Hill"

Parody Written by:

John A. Barry

The Lyrics

Bray after bray,
A-drone on the Hill,
The men and the women’s voices shriek—
Their purpose is “nil.”
Near nobody wants to know them
’cause they reek, being full of stool.
So folks have to kink their nostrils,
Stifle stool on the Hill,
Hope the wind will die down;
If it rises, there’s dread
’cause they’re turd-filled and brown.

Smell every day—
Dreck D.C. crowd:
These men and women, unalloyed caca, don’t make us proud.
Near nobody wants to hear them
Or their sounds, the hissing of snakes. . .
Puffed coterie, grotesque blowfish,

Butt-dumped stools on the Hill—
See their polls going down. . .
Worse than lice that have fed
On pubes at tool or mound.

No, nobody seems to like them
’cause all know that they’re gonna screw
Them when there’s time off from stealing.

How’d these fools gain the Hill?
Why’d we vote for these clowns?
Got no eyes in our heads?
Post-voting, naught but frowns.

Oh, frowns at clowns who’re brown, we’ve found.

In campaigns we listen to them—
It is we who’re the fools
When we like them?

But stools on the Hill
Arrive in D.C. town.
Fine ideas in their head. . .
Acton’s axiom* abounds.

Oh, ’bounds, abounds, abounds. . . .

*“Power tends to corrupt, and absolute power corrupts absolutely.”—John Emerich Edward Dalberg Acton, first Baron Acton (1834–1902)

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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 5

Voting Breakdown

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    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   5

User Comments

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Patrick - September 27, 2011 - Report this comment
Fabulous. We let the worst among us rule the rest of us. It's a welfare program for the well-connected and well-credentialed. I think of it this way. Captain Sullenberger, the pilot who safely landed his damaged airliner in the Hudson River with no loss of life, would probably make an outstanding congressman. I have no idea what his politics are, but he has a lifetime of practice dealing with reality. Performance is the only standard, and wishing won't make things so, only compliance with the inexorable laws of physics, mechanics, meteorology, etc. On the other hand, is there any member of the House, Senate, White House or Supreme Court you would trust to fold and fly a paper airplane?
Andria - September 27, 2011 - Report this comment
Great one... the state of our government, among other things, tells me that our country is pretty much finished, and your analogy of Congress being full of stool is a good one. We will be lucky if the US makes it 300 years as one country...
AFW - September 27, 2011 - Report this comment
Sounds about right, to me
John Barry - September 27, 2011 - Report this comment
Thanks, Patrick. "Sulley" lives in the same town as I. At an event honoring him, the mayor et al. droned on and on, some woman sang the Star Spangled Banner off key, and when Sulley got up to speak, he said, "Thanks, but I was just doing my job."
Andria, AFW, thanks also.
2Eagle - September 27, 2011 - Report this comment
I think the OS was meant to be about the Hollywood Hills, but the Capitol Hill theme fits in just fine.
NorCalPeach - September 30, 2011 - Report this comment
. . . schmucks gut, Kaiser Bray und Nay ! !

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