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Song Parodies -> "Apostrophe"

Original Song Title:

"Don't Bother Me"

Original Performer:


Parody Song Title:


Parody Written by:

John A. Barry

The Lyrics

When something's gone
In words I've spawned,
My right pinkie
Takes direct aim
At the board's plane,
Attains the key.

On the display the mark is shown:

When I must cleave
A word and leave
Out "a," I know
It's just not right
If I should slight
This mark, forgo.

I must apply it now to 'bout:

So if "because" I should truncate,
You see, confusion would await
If I didn't replace the "be"
With an apostrophe.

Then if "appear"
I need to shear,
Replace the "a."
Once telephone
Was noted: 'phone
But not today.

"Round" for "around" ain't left alone:

Notice in "I'm," the "a" is out:

Let's say that you encounter 'bate
With no context. What would you state:
A verb that's 'bout a type of beat
Or implying retreat?

The time is here
For me to clear
Out, 'bate inveigh'.*
Abate the drone,
Leave you alone,
Sashay, fade 'way.

Now I'll come 'round and I will 'tone:
Apology. A posh trophy?
'at's not for me. Appalling me.
A pall on screed 'at's called acme's
Antipodes.** A pox on me.

*inveigh[ing]: railing
**opposite (an-TIP-uh-deez)

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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 5

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   5

User Comments

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2Eagle - September 14, 2006 - Report this comment
At least you didn't use any abbreviations.
alvin rhodes - September 14, 2006 - Report this comment
my reading was punctuated by laughter
John Barry - September 14, 2006 - Report this comment
T'anks, you two.
Stuart McArthur - September 14, 2006 - Report this comment
very good points on a fascinating subject - recently I correctly typed 'though for although but it just look so dumb, I got rid of it again - and I always use 'til while I note that till (hugely incorrect) is becoming prevalent - all your points made with your usual clever wit JAB - 555
Kristof Robertson - September 14, 2006 - Report this comment
As an unrepentant apostrophiser, I loved this J'A'B...555
TJC - September 14, 2006 - Report this comment
#3 on you Apostropolusa Juggernaut...Great work and funny truncations! Sort of along the same line of thought, I'd really like to see a parody on diacritical marks (truely!) but think that so many of them are tied up in Old Irish, French or even Esperanto that I wouldn't have a clue (or is that caron)... now YOU, on the other hand...
Grammer Gak - September 17, 2006 - Report this comment
This song was bitch'en

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