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Song Parodies -> "Springs of Bed Decay"

Original Song Title:

"Things We Said Today"

Original Performer:


Parody Song Title:

"Springs of Bed Decay"

Parody Written by:

John A. Barry

The Lyrics

*Tine: a sharp, projecting point; Hypnos: the Greek god of sleep.
One pops out above me,
One pops out below.
These obstacles shove me
To mattress' hollow,
Where I feel so lonely—
I am afraid to hit the hay.
Now I cannot slumber—
Springs of bed decay.

One digs in my spine, curled;
It does not feel fine.
I'd like to call my girl—
I can't reach the line.
One night I was dreaming,
When one plunged into vertebrae,
Luckily, not lumbar.
Springs of bed decay

Me, I'm the spring-ducking kind.
I quickly hunch so they cannot punch
A hole in my behind,
Tuck my rear away
To save my butt
From makeshift tines* curled
Too close to my buns.
How these things unwind! Furled
Before they're unsprung.

So now I am scheming
How to keep myself from harm's way.
I will be dismembered,
If here I do stay.

So I become a fluff guy—
Jump up, pay big bucks for one that's stuffed
With down, the eider kind:
Duck again. I lay on powderpuff.
It's a supine world
That can't come unsprung.
In my mind, dreams fine whirl.
I doze on and on.

Slumbertime, I'm dreaming
Deep in fluff, I won't spring awake.
He's got my sleep number:
Hypnos,* king till day.

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.9
How Funny: 4.4
Overall Rating: 4.4

Total Votes: 7

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   1
 5   6

User Comments

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AFW - December 21, 2004 - Report this comment
Not bed...not bed, at all! 5's
alvin rhodes - December 21, 2004 - Report this comment
a smile sprung to my face reading this...5s
John Barry - December 21, 2004 - Report this comment
Thanks, AFW, Alvin.
MasonR - December 21, 2004 - Report this comment
Hey John, at least it wasn't a water bed! 555
Kristof Robertson - December 22, 2004 - Report this comment
Snoretastic!! 555

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