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Song Parodies -> "Daniel Rather"

Original Song Title:

"Come Together"

Original Performer:


Parody Song Title:

"Daniel Rather"

Parody Written by:

Guy DiRito

The Lyrics

He's such a flatfoot, he's all full of baloney,
Network with the eyeball, think he be bipolar,
His left wing commen-tary,
Don't know what he's smokin' but it makes his brain freeze.

Sure hate his news line he's as stale as moth ball,
I give him the finger, he's a caca throw-a,
He got left wing view, full o' shee',
One thing I can tell you he's not on NBC,
Daniel Rather, quite dull, watch and see.

His news production with Mike Wallace live shoot,
These guys should be ignored, 'cause ol' Dan's a cracker,
'Cause his seat droops below his knee.
Sittin' in his armchair as he's cuttin' the cheese.
Daniel Rather, quite dull, watch and see.

He evening anchor, he not early morning,
Likes to muddy water, he all out of kilter.
He drones on and on and on, ooh wee.
Not into news seeking, he just spouts his debris.
Daniel Rather, quite dull, watch and see.

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.0
How Funny: 3.8
Overall Rating: 3.8

Total Votes: 13

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   3
 2   0
 3   0
 4   1
 5   9

User Comments

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Adagio - December 25, 2003 - Report this comment
Good...beat me to it, huh? :D
Jude Rodamer - December 25, 2003 - Report this comment
5-5-5 Even though we disagree about Mr. Rather, the parody is sound and well done. Happy Holidays!!
Johnny D - December 25, 2003 - Report this comment
Hahaha!! This is funny stuff - I'm not down on ol' Dan, but I must admit this is one funny parody !
Johnny D - December 25, 2003 - Report this comment
Oh and by the way I did indeed vote 555 - ever hear Dan sing? He's done that on David Letterman's show - goofy stuff !
AussieBullDog - December 25, 2003 - Report this comment
The only thing I knew about Dan Rather I learned from South Park, which was that he isn't real. Apparently he's real after all, so the fives from me are as much a sympathy vote as a compliment of the quality of the parody.
Guy - December 25, 2003 - Report this comment
Thanks everyone for the votes and comments. This Beatles song just sceamed Mr Rather's name when I first looked at it. And ABD you can consider yourself lucky that CBS news is not part of Australian TV.
Mc9 - December 25, 2003 - Report this comment
Dan Rather is actually quite centrist and is one of the most respected TV journalists in the US. If you consider him "left wing," you must be conservative to the extreme. Opinions of him aside, this is not well-written satire. "Caca throw-a"? "His seat droops below his knee"? "Full o' shee'"? "Flatfoot"???
Guy - December 25, 2003 - Report this comment
So glad you enjoyed it Mc9. Merry Christmas.
John Jenkins - December 25, 2003 - Report this comment
Good parody, Guy. As long as there are people like Mc9 who think that Dan Rather is centrist, I am glad that there are people like you who work through Christmas Eve to write parodies pointing out that he is not.
The Great Karlando - December 26, 2003 - Report this comment
Unlike Mc9, I think this is a very well-written parody. You use a lot of the rhymes from the original, which had a lot of goofy words in it too. I think ya probly just cheesed him off a little bit by rippin' on his favorite national news anchor. All 5's my man.
Guy - December 26, 2003 - Report this comment
Thanks John and Karlando and a Merry Christmas to you both. ;-)
Claude Prez - December 26, 2003 - Report this comment
Totally agree with Karlando especially; this works really well. And I never watch the news so I'll just take your word for it that he's a pinko (no worse than all the sheep who take HIS word for stuff, right?)
Guy - December 26, 2003 - Report this comment
I think you nailed it Claude. Thanks.
Mc9 - December 26, 2003 - Report this comment
I don't watch Rather often, but I know left-wing when I see it, and Dan Rather hardly qualifies. The further one political direction you lean, the further the other direction everyone else seems to be. It is clear to me, then, that this writer is obsessively conservative. Am I wrong? As for how well this piece works as satire, it's mediocre at best. I see that others have rushed in to disagree with my assessment, however, so it must be only gushing praise you're after here and not objective criticism. So be it. If this is the quality of work that rates top scores at this site, I'm sorry I crashed your little party.
Michael Pacholek - December 26, 2003 - Report this comment
Even if we accept Guy's premise -- and how can you? -- this is well below his best work. Anybody who thinks Rather is left-wing probably also thinks Howard Dean is to the left of George McGovern, and that Faux News -- I mean, Fox News is actually fair or balanced. I don't like Rather either, but it's because I think he's a pompous boor, a "quality" that knows no politics. Mc9: Nawwww, Guy's not obsessively right wing... not at all... not even close... he's as moderate as Ashcroft, Rumsfeld and Cheney! And that's the truth!
Guy - December 26, 2003 - Report this comment
I won't entertain any perspective on what my views really are. It is moot. This is a parody and the aim is humor. If you don't like it then you get one vote. Use it as you see fit.
John Jenkins - December 26, 2003 - Report this comment
Is Dan Rather liberal? Consider three facts:
1. During the search for Chandra Levy, the missing intern who was linked to Democratic Congressman Gary Condit, Rather failed to air a single story about the search for eleven weeks until the story had completely unfolded. While the rest of the mainstream media was reporting that the police had questioned Condit several times during that period and considered charging him with obstruction of justice, Rather remained silent. When he finally did air the story, he blamed his management for not supporting his silence.
2. On January 27, 1993, The Associated Press reported that nine of President Clinton's Cabinet appointees were millionaires. On January 23, 2001, the AP reported that President George W. Bush's cabinet appointees were "mostly millionaires." Dan Rather decided to follow the AP's lead with the Bush story, but not with the Clinton story. During the 8-year Clinton administration, Rather never mentioned that there were millionaires in the Cabinet.
3. Andy Rooney, who admits to being a liberal, calls Rather "transparently liberal."

I understand that some people like Dan Rather's style and/or his politics, but I don't understand how anyone can deny that he has a strong liberal bias that affects his reporting.

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