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Song Parodies -> "Rules Nerd"

Original Song Title:

"Cool Girl"

Original Performer:

Tove Lo

Parody Song Title:

"Rules Nerd"

Parody Written by:

the_conqueror_of_parodies

The Lyrics

I could swear I've written something like this before, but my searches proved unfruitful, so here we go, parody about a picky game player!
Make fun of me, I won't hold it against ya
It's just my thing, not bein' a sore loser (mmm-mmm-mmm-mmm-mmm)
Want to be true to how the makers planned it
I know that you may all call me pedantic (mmm-mmm-mmm-mmm-mmm)
Just doesn't feel authentic, honest
A bit less fun
When you pull this reckless nonsense
The game becomes weak, yeah
I cannot be free like you
I'm a, I'm a

I'm a rules nerd, I'm a, I'm a rules nerd
Controlled dice rolls, how I must move, boy
I'm a rules nerd, I'm a, I'm a rules nerd
Tent poles, won't fold, stand by my moves, boy

Rules you don't like, but you still gotta keep 'em (oh-oh)
Stay in the lines like you're colourin' children (mmm-mmm-mmm-mmm-mmm)
I stole your kill? Not the reason I stopped it (oh)
You can't add well, want your wins to be honest (mmm-mmm-mmm-mmm-mmm)
I want this to be fair, so stop with
Those gestures, bud
I know you can wait for one sec
There's no time crunch, see, yeah
Want things to be even, dude
I'm a, I'm a

I'm a rules nerd, I'm a, I'm a rules nerd
Out of control, describin' you, boy (oh-oh-oh)
I'm a rules nerd, I'm a, I'm a rules nerd
Fudged all dice rolls? Ain't right, it's true, boy
I'm a rules nerd, I'm a, I'm a rules nerd
Sure, call me "dork", that's quite the truth, boy
I'm a rules nerd, I'm a, I'm a rules nerd
Want strong tent poles, so tight, won't move, boy

If you played this right (if you played this right)
We would have more fun
Waste all kinds of time (uh-uh-uh)
And yet I'm called the jerk
I'm a

I'm a rules nerd, I'm a, I'm a rules nerd
Won't fold, just roll how I told you, boy (boy)
I'm a rules nerd, I'm a, I'm a rules nerd
Played wrong too long, hence why I fume, boy
I'm a rules nerd, I'm a, I'm a, I'm a, I'm a (they're rules for you)
I'm a rules nerd, I'm a, I'm a, I'm a, I'm a
I'm a (mmm-mmm-mmm), I'm a rules nerd, I'm a, I'm a rules nerd
Play all night long 'til I un-fool boys

Otherwise known as "how I play D&D". I've saved lives with my double-checking pedantry, which is mildly amusing since I'm playing the monk class, which mostly revolves around hitting the enemy with sticks.

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