-> "Don't Cleave"
Original Song Title:
"Don't Leave"
Original Performer:
Snakehips & MØ
Parody Song Title:
"Don't Cleave"
The Lyrics
Enemies put to death, that I get
Otherwise they would end me
But what hurts is the method I see
A little bit too messy
So if you could just hold up, can you hold up for me?
The way that you're choppin' is a horrible scene
Never really worth it except for your own glee
We are a team so you need to at least think about it
Don't cleave, slicin' in half to watch the parts bleed
Unnecessary, trust me
Can run 'em through or have just their head severed
But could you keep the main body together?
Don't go and tell me that it's unavoidable
'Cause I know that line is bollocks
Vertical, horizontal, thrice, whatever
Just stop haphazardly makin' 'em severed for me, yeah
Little favour for me (oh, whoa-oh)
May be true when you leave them in two (oh-oh, oh, oh-oh, oh)
They're won't be comin' back to stab, no (oh-oh, oh, oh-oh, oh-oh, oh)
But what I tend to find (oh-oh, oh, oh-oh, oh)
Is that blood ruins the loot and all their clothes (oh-oh, oh, oh-oh, oh-oh, oh)
It's gonna look real obvious we stole a man's duds
When there's stitches down the middle, it's real sus
"So I won't do vertical, okay?" It's not
Never clean cut (oh-oh, oh-oh) and there's not a midriff bared among them
Don't cleave, goes right through pockets where they might keep
Ammo or other goodies
Very expensive stuff that could be severed
I'd rather keep all of that stuff together
Don't go and tell me that it's inescapable
'Cause we both know that is bollocks
I've seen you practice many more sword methods
I hope you haven't chopped through all the records
Can already sense that you want to explain to me the truth
That I'm hypocritical 'cause of the power that I use
How can I bitch that you're bein' messy when I'm makin' ev'rybody's heads go pop?
I've got some nerve, I must say that you're bein' silly
Don't cleave, please, I don't pop anything that's not fleshy
Don't need their brains for nothin'
And I don't let the fluids go wherever
Only upon the ground or wall, whatever
Don't cleave, makin' a mess for our P.R. peeps
Yes, you need to be worried
It may seem like you have free rein to sever
That looks like we're the ones here causin' terror (it looks like we're the bad guys causin' terror, you see?)
Don't go and tell me that it's unavoidable
Both you and I know it's bollocks
But more importantly it puts the pressure
Back on us, so could you stop all the severin', please? Yeah
Leave the messes to me
Your Vote & Comment Counts
The parody authors spend a lot of time writing parodies for the website and they
appreciate feedback in the form of votes and comments. Please take some time to
leave a comment below about this parody.
|
|
Voting Results
|
Pacing: | 5.0 | |
How Funny: | 5.0 | |
Overall Rating: | 5.0 | |
|
Total Votes: | 13 |
|
Voting Breakdown
The following represent how many people voted for each category.
| | | | Pacing | | | How Funny | | | Overall Rating | |
| 1 | | 0 | |
| 0 | |
| 0 | |
|
| 2 | | 0 | |
| 0 | |
| 0 | |
|
| 3 | | 0 | |
| 0 | |
| 0 | |
|
| 4 | | 0 | |
| 0 | |
| 0 | |
|
| 5 | | 13 | |
| 13 | |
| 13 | |
|