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Song Parodies -> "Nixed the Tights"

Original Song Title:

"Hit the Lights"

Original Performer:

Selena Gomez & the Scene

Parody Song Title:

"Nixed the Tights"

Parody Written by:


The Lyrics

"Yeah, like Batman and Robin. Only...I ain't wearing no tights. You can wear tights, but I'm not wearing tights." - D.L., Heroes
Whether born with it or from some weird goo
Got cool powers now either way
Bit outside the law, haven't really trained
But who cares? I can breathe in space
Feels so good to hear "Thank God you saved us"
Wish it wasn't on the second line
Because after I've punched that psychic douche
It's all "No bright colours? Why?"

Nixed the tights because I don't want to
Be blown up on sight
I don't like bein' clad in bright blue
In the dark of night
Nixed the tights because I don't want to
Look a clown, alright?
I don't like lookin' like a cartoon
Walkin' through real life

Not my style to have tight leather ride up
In my most personal, private place
Same deal if it's spandex, they both still fill up
With my sweat, takes way too long to drain
Think of the money that I'm savin'
On repairs and redesigns
Because I've never had a real clue
'Bout the fashion world, alright

Nixed the tights because I don't want to
Swim in stank all night
I don't like knockin' out the big goons
With my pits, ain't right
Nixed the tights because I don't want to
Deal with weird websites
I don't like bein' called a balloon
Weight gain's only slight
Don't have mad abs, hurts when I save the world's day
And they're just a jerk with my non-model shape
Nixed the tights because I don't want to
Live with all that shite

Sayin' no, no, no, no friggin' way
'Fraid I won't, won't, won't, won't save the day
In a suit, I can banter with all kinds of asses
Without mine full centre

Nixed the tights because I don't want to
Am I clear tonight (am I clear tonight)?
I don't like your bizarre attitude
To my clothes, they're fine
Basic pants and shirt, maybe shorts on the days
When the hot sun hurts plus a mask on the face
Nixed the tights (ah-ooh), doesn't mean I want to (ah-ooh-ooh-ooh)
Show myself tonight

"The only place anyone is wearing that is trick-or-treating, or as part of some kinky role-playing scenario." - Jessica Jones, Jessica Jones (duh-doy)

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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 13

Voting Breakdown

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    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   13

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