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Song Parodies -> "Rivets 2 U"

Original Song Title:

"Give It 2 U"

Original Performer:

Robin Thicke ft. 2 Chainz & Kendrick Lama

Parody Song Title:

"Rivets 2 U"

Parody Written by:

the_conqueror_of_parodies

The Lyrics

Part of my Pop Danthology 2013 self-challenge. An enterprising young man tries to pitch some...upgrades for his nerdy pal. Who doesn't seem as receptive for some reason...
Okay, buddy (yeah)
Got a thing to say, buddy (huh)
Won't take a tic (yeah)
Let me explain, buddy (buddy, buddy)
No, don't leave (yeah)
I know you want some advantage (buddy, buddy)
Come on, man, don't leave
Won't hurt like a ripped-off bandage (hey, hey)

Man, just work with me
This'll be good for you, so just work with me
No more disease, it's true, so just work with me
You'll be a brand new you, so just work with me
Ooh-ooh-ooh, I got a gift for ya
I got this for ya, might be a switch for ya
It's circuits for ya, they're gonna stick to ya
Grafted to ya, stickin' rivets to ya
Buddy, buddy, let me install in ya
This little chip for ya, new start for ya
Cool parts in ya, you know I wanna start craftin'
Got all these small bits to jam in

Grea-eat nerd
You know that's what you a-are, tha-at's fi-ine
No shame in bein' i-into sci-fi-i
So that's why I think tha-at you-ou'll li-ike
Me stickin' rivets to you-ou-ou to-onight
Sure it's somethin' that you've drea-eamed 'bout, ri-ight?
So du-u-ude, ooh-ooh, buddy
Let me fit you-our eye-eyeba-alls with lasers
Stick rivets to you

Thought that you would squee
Not yell "You're a creep!
I won't be a freak!"
Come on, work with me
Ooh-ooh-ooh, one huge nerd
Why you gotta be such a jerk?
All that I wanna do's help ya, nerd
On your back will go these rockets, worth
Just a little bit of pain, I tell ya
And what I tell ya's the truth, won't lie to ya
Please let me put these huge tank treads in ya
Feet, they'll get more grip for ya
Crazy, I'm not, mate, help ya
Let me go put guns in ya
Yeah, so any fool who wants to take ya
Yeah, will wish they'd missed ya

Grea-eat nerd
I thought you'd have a hu-uge-a-ass smi-ile
Then run in circles fo-or a long whi-ile (racin')
Not kick my balls cause I-I sai-aid I-I'll
Stick lots of rivets to you-ou-ou to-onight
Really thought that it would be-e your sty-yle
But du-u-ude (nerd), ooh-ooh, buddy (yeah)
Let me put dri-ills i-in a-all your fingers (please, mate)
Stick rivets to you

Extendin' neck (extendin' neck)
Right when you want it (right when you want it)
When some asshole's giant hat
Blockin' your line of sight at the pictures (yo)
Won't you let me do it (won't you let me do it)?
Man, you've got the wrong reaction (jerk)
I'd assumed that you'd have been longin' for
Some kind of robot action (do it)
Sick of human inaction (do it)
You hate my benefaction (stupid)
Too lame (too lame), so much stuff to jam in (so much stuff to jam in)
Sharp blades with quick retraction (do it)
And wheels for racin' action (do it)
S-So great (s-so great), where's your satisfaction? Uh
You want a chainsaw? I can make that, uh
How 'bout an exchangeable face, man? Uh
What's with the rolled eyes, guy? Uh
Please stop wastin' all my time, uh
Think it would be a bit fun, uh
To be able to swim tons, uh
With these two retractable air tanks
Deploy the webs 'tween your digits, "no thanks"?
Plain don't get your constant rejection
I'm offerin' to stop your frail human limitations
I just wanna slice your pale flesh open
Put tech inside, dude, then with staples, close it
Yet you freak, dude, actin' like I'm so mental
Throwin' shoes at me, right at my dentals
But it's so crafty, hidin' a pistol
Inside your ass, see, won't that convince you?

Grea-eat nerd
This makes no sense, cause you-ou shou-ould li-ike
Bein' a cyborg, cau-ause it all li-ines (perfect)
Up with the nerdy thi-ings you-ou li-ike
Let me stick rivets to you-ou-ou to-onight
And place small compartments i-in your thi-ighs
For you-ou-ou, ooh-ooh, buddy
Make your nose a-a pla-asgu-un emplacement
Stick rivets to you-ou-ou to-onight
And jam wheels inside your pa-alms, cause I-I
Want to-o-o, ooh-ooh, buddy
It might be ha-andy-y, no-o, don't tase me
Stick rivets to you-ou-ou

Stick rivets to you

Okay, so this song has two main versions, the difference being the appearance (or lack thereof) of 2 Chainz. The version with him on is the remix, so you'd think I wouldn't do it, right? But then the music video is the version with 2 Chainz, so you'd think that that's the main version, but it's the remix which is like a bonus version but Wikipedia lists it as both guest rappers under the image of the single art which only credits Lamar and oh no I've gone cross-eyed.

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