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Song Parodies -> "Return Everything"

Original Song Title:

"Give Me Everything"

Original Performer:

Pitbull

Parody Song Title:

"Return Everything"

Parody Written by:

the_conqueror_of_parodies

The Lyrics

You know how in the Simpsons Homer borrows pretty much half of Flander's stuff? Well this parody is from Flander's perspective of this typical scenario...except Flanders isn't as forgiving here...
Workin' in the yard
There's a lawn to mow and weeds to whack
Would if I could, 'cause all my gear
Has been lent to my neighbour Joe, that prat
Swear his brain's on sedatives, I'm positive
Otherwise he'd give them back
And so I'll call his mobile
Ask him very nicely
Yeah, right

Tonight
I want my stuff back tonight
Return everything tonight
I ask you, Joe, that lawnmower you borrowed?
Return it tonight

Asked you yesterday
For my stuff today
You just waved me off
Well, I've had enough

(Return it tonight)

Give it back tonight
Or I'll make you pay
Tellin' you, I am

Tired of your lazy excuses
Return everything tonight
Give me back my stuff tonight
Or I'll kick your arse tonight
Return everything tonight

Took advantage of me, right
You knew I'm so unnaturally nice, can't refuse any request
But tonight, no more big toothy grin
Cause you're six feet deep in debt
This is insane, borrowed list keeps growin'
Tired of loanin'
To your lazy hide
You keep avoidin' deadlines, knowin'
When you give stuff back, it's all broken

Puttin' my foot down, buddy
No more I.O.U's, buddy
Can't wait 'til tomorrow
Give me my stuff tonight
Joey

Believe me
But what's left of my patience has flown the coop, tonight
You know that rake you took from me, yes you do, alright

No, Joey, that "I don't know" will not fool me, right
Don't put it off 'til tomorrow

Tonight
I want my stuff back tonight
Return everything tonight
I'd tase you, bro, but that you also borrowed

Return it tonight

Asked you yesterday
For my saw today
You just blew me off
I have had enough

(Return it tonight)

Give it back tonight
Or you I will flay
With my whip tonight

At least I would if I had it here
Return everything tonight
Give me back my stuff tonight
Or I'll whoop your arse tonight
Return everything tonight

Where is my car?
My car keys, you nicked 'em
Said it was a quick trip up the road
Three months after
You've still got it
And your own car covered in snow
Was that just it
A pretty bullshit reason
Coulda borrowed my shovel, and I'll bet
If I had a tuba
You'd have asked to borrow that as well
Keep it in that cesspit

You call a garage, buddy
Filled with borrowed shite, buddy
Can't wait 'til tomorrow
Give me my stuff tonight
Joey

Excuse me
But I would like my mp3 player back tonight
And I would like my hose and my chainsaw back tonight
Look, Joey, I won't be a pushover tonight
I can't wait until tomorrow

Tonight
I want my stuff back tonight
Return everything tonight
Remember Joe, that hammer that you borrowed
Return it tonight

Asked you yesterday
For my rug today
You just waved it off
I have had enough

(Return it tonight)

Give it back tonight
Or I'll have to stay
At your house tonight

And yell my request right in your face
Return everything tonight
Give me back my stuff tonight
Or I'll shoot your arse tonight
Return everything tonight

Well, blow me
You've thrown up the white flag to all my demands tonight
All of my stuff is back and that is okay, alright
But there's a favour I need to ask you tonight
There's a film I'd like to borrow

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 LittleLots
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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 5

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 0
 0
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
 0
 
 4   0
 0
 0
 
 5   5
 5
 5
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Abbott Skelding - February 12, 2012 - Report this comment
Nice work! Was kind of hard to follow, not your fault, but rather because of the speed of the song, I got lost in a few places. From what I could tell, sounds like you nailed it. Nice work!
Porfle Popnecker - February 18, 2012 - Report this comment
I hope my neighbor doesn't see this.
Peter Andersson - February 25, 2012 - Report this comment
Did you return the original song when done with it? Here are some 5s, don't remember who I got them from originally though...
Glen S - February 25, 2012 - Report this comment
Good work with the OS. Loved the request at the end, and 'I'd tase you, bro, but that you also borrowed'
Matthias - February 26, 2012 - Report this comment
I was also a fan of the "Don't tase me bro" reference. Also the rug line reminded me of "The Big Lebowski" and anything that reminds me of that movie is alright in my book. I would love to hear Dave record this one for you. Out of all the songs I've read so far this one had the best OS to make a parody of.
Blaydeman - February 26, 2012 - Report this comment
(SOTM) The OS is really quicka and doesn't really lend itself to comedy well. It was good, but I've seen a lot better from you before. It had some funny parts like "I'd tase you, bro, but that you also borrowed" that was really funny. Good work, but not your best.
Arwen - February 29, 2012 - Report this comment
SOTM....you had me at Ned Flanders. Love that guy! haha. I like to pretend this OS is just by Ne-Yo, because Ne-Yo could sing the phone book and I'd be a fan...=) I enjoyed this!
Matthias - June 07, 2013 - Report this comment
(ABC) Great to RETURN to this parody!!!
Max Power - June 10, 2013 - Report this comment
Homer also indirectly killed Maude, makes you wonder why Flander didn;t try to kill Homer.
Agrimorfee - June 15, 2013 - Report this comment
I am with Blaydeman, this isnt one of your best. When you described what he borrowed it was interesting, not just complaining about it,
Abbott Skelding - June 17, 2013 - Report this comment
See above. I really loved the "I'd tase you bro, but that you also borrowed" line. Good work!
Blaydeman - June 17, 2013 - Report this comment
(ABC) See above ^^^

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