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Song Parodies -> "Coastal Breeze"

Original Song Title:

"Post to Be"

Original Performer:

Omarion ft. Chris Brown & Jhené Aiko

Parody Song Title:

"Coastal Breeze"

Parody Written by:

the_conqueror_of_parodies

The Lyrics

Part of my "50 Shades of Pop" self-challenge. Dude wants to enjoy the seaside wind, but his "friend" may not share the same opinion...
I'm coolin' off
Breezy-y-y-y (on my skin)
Love it
Rollin' down that window

One of the pros for me
When on holida-ay is the coastal breeze, oh
Nothin's more lovely than a coastal breeze
I'm really lovin' this here coastal breeze
Ooh-ooh, dunno what you know 'bout me
I rarely get a chance to feel the coastal breeze
Ooh-ooh, the sun's roastin' me
When the clouds ain't dumpin' their load on me, ooh-ooh-ooh
So rare, the coastal breeze
Yeah, I love the coastal breeze, ooh-ooh-ooh
Yeah, that lovely coastal breeze
Let me e-enjo-oy this here coastal breeze

Relish ev'ry time that it shows up (shows up)
I can just stand here with the windows up (woo, woo)
Arms spread wide, hair flowin' so free (hey)
Like this was a shampoo ad, bu-ut see (haha)
Like an ass, you won't let me (hey)
Keep complainin' 'bout mozzies (you)
You're all "It's not winter (not winter)
It shouldn't be this windy, stop it, mister"
Who knew that I could make you testy
By lettin' the breeze in? Oh-oh-oh
But I'm just tryna refresh me (so)
So let it blow on me, don't be a do-o-ope (hey)

Best not be jokin' me
Don't get how much I-I want this coastal breeze (aah, yeah-eah)
It isn't funny, stop provokin' me (yeah, yeah)
You little dummy, want my coastal breeze
Ooh-ooh, don't care if your toenails freeze
As long as I can relax with this coastal breeze
Ooh-ooh, you don't know 'bout me
Sick of sweat on my pecs, so don't bar me (ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh)
From this here coastal breeze (ooh-ooh-ooh)
Yeah, I love the coastal breeze (ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh)
Yeah, that lovely coastal breeze (ooh-ooh-ooh)
Wanna e-enjo-oy this here coastal breeze

Of all the times I've seen your temper blow up (blow up)
Didn't think it'd show when windows are up (are up)
Your reasons are a pile of shit, please excuse my French
There ain't no way that they'll hold up (hold up)
I understand that you don't want any insects
But that's what the screen windows are for, you too-ool (such a tool)
Your whole "it's summertime" discussion got no weight to it
Summer breeze: it's a thing, foo-oo-ool, oh-oh
Let the wind blo-ow, yeah-yeah
I've been checkin' but there's nothin' loose to get blown like (yeah)
On the floor, no-o
I'm not a dope, just a flow-lovin' bro-o

"You're obsessed"? You're jokin' me
I paid for this holiday, you're owin' me (so don't be stupid)
Can't keep ev'ry window closed, see
Cause the air con ain't the same as the coastal breeze
It's the sea smell that makes it all work for me
Can't see any reason why you're a jerk to me
Ooh-ooh, just want that coastal breeze
Put that duct tape down, you total creep
Ooh-ooh-ooh, it's just a coastal breeze
Ooh-ooh-ooh, I love the coastal breeze
Ooh-ooh-ooh, that lovely coastal breeze
Wanna e-enjo-oy this here coastal breeze
Ooh-ooh-ooh

Just take a load off, please (calm down, you to-otal frea-eak)
You're the one obse-essed with this coastal breeze (ooh-ooh-ooh)
You're gettin' angry at the coastal breeze (coastal bree-ee-eeze)
Little too tetchy at the coastal breeze (really tetchy)
Ooh-ooh, if the wind you don't want, plea-ease (yeah)
Board yourself up in your room, want my coastal breeze (yeah, yeah, yeah)
Ooh-ooh, is that loaded? Geez
Takin' this too far, it's not like you'll freeze (woah-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh, jerk) (ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh)
It's just a coastal breeze (yeah-eah) (ooh-ooh-ooh)
Yeah, a little coastal breeze (oh-oh-oh, je-erk) (ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh)
Yeah, I want my coastal breeze (hey) (ooh-ooh-ooh)
Wanna e-enjo-oy this here coastal breeze

Why'd I invi-i-i-i-i-i-ite you? Geez
Thought you'd enjoy this weather, ma-ate (it's great)
But no, you became a jerk (huge jerk)
Yeah-eah-eah-eah-eah (yeah-eah-eah)
Why'd you come? I just have to kno-ow, bruh
Heat, you whinged about i-it
I try to fix that, you're angry, oh-oh-ooh (hey-ee-ee-ee-yeah-ee-yeah-ee)

I'm coolin' off
So breezy-y-y
But you're refusin'
Best guess: you're stupid

Feel free to project your disinterest in cool breezes on the asshole, my presumably-mostly American audience ;)

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.6
How Funny: 4.6
Overall Rating: 4.6

Total Votes: 12

Voting Breakdown

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