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Song Parodies -> "Patty Hearst"

Original Song Title:

"Judas"

Original Performer:

Lady Gaga

Parody Song Title:

"Patty Hearst"

Parody Written by:

Robert D. Arndt Jr.

The Lyrics

Patty Hearst was born in 1954 as third daughter to Randolph Hearst. At age 19, at her Berkeley apt, she was kidnapped by the SLA (Symbionese Liberation Army) from fiance Steve Weed. Within 3 months she had bonded with her captors and assumed the new identity of Tania. The SLA initially had demanded a swap for jailed SLA prisoners that was a non-starter. Instead, they then demanded that Randolph Hearst pay $400 million to feed poor Californians (roughly $70 worth of groceries for everyone). Hearst had $6 million worth of food delivered to the poor of the Bay Area but complaints arose of the food being of poor quality. Since Patty had joined the SLA she was caught on video robbing the Hibernia Bank in SF armed with a modified M-1 carbine. She was arrested by the FBI in September 1975 and the defense made passionate pleas concerning her age and Stockholm Syndrome. Nevertheless, she was sentenced to 35 years in prison. This was commuted by President Carter to 2 years and she actually served just 22 months before being released. She married her bodyguard Bernard Shaw and had 2 daughters, In Jan 2001 President Clinton gave her a full pardon.
Stock, Stock, Stock, Stock
-holm Syndrome with Patty Hearst

Stock, Stock, Stock, Stock
-holm Syndrome with Patty Hearst

Heiress!
Patty Hearst
Heiress!
Patty Hearst
Heiress!
Patty Hearst
Heiress!
VICTIM

When they came for me, I was 19
Living in an apartment in Berkeley
Was brainwashed by the brutal SLA
Just 3 months, and new identity

[Tania]

They brought me round, brought me round, round
Urban Guerilla proud, Guerilla proud

[Chorus]
Was just a Brainwashed Tool, the Hydra was so cool
Tania born from Patty Hearst, vainly
Was just a Brainwashed Tool, the Hydra was so cool
Tania born from Patty Hearst, vainly

Stock, Stock, Stock, Stock
-holm Syndrome with Patty Hearst

Stock, Stock, Stock, Stock
-holm Syndrome with Patty Hearst

Heiress!
Patty Hearst
Heiress!
Patty Hearst
Heiress!
Patty Hearst
Heiress!
VICTIM

Demand for swap went so poorly
$6 million my daddy had to pay
Donated food was a dirty trick
Most of it spoiled for people of the Bay

They brought me round, brought me round, round
Urban Guerilla proud, Guerilla proud

Was just a Brainwashed Tool, the Hydra was so cool
Tania born from Patty Hearst, vainly
Was just a Brainwashed Tool, the Hydra was so cool
Tania born from Patty Hearst, vainly

Stock, Stock, Stock, Stock
-holm Syndrome with Patty Hearst

Stock, Stock, Stock, Stock
-holm Syndrome with Patty Hearst

Heiress!
Patty Hearst
Heiress!
Patty Hearst
Heiress!
Patty Hearst
Heiress!
VICTIM

[Bridge]
Robbing a bank made more sense,
It was my loyalty test
Hot looker, M-1 by my chest, I lost my mind
But in psychiatric defense
Bonding with captors made sense
For the crime I was sentenced,
22 months I served my time

FBI caught me,
Commuted sentence saw me released early
People did forgave me,
Clinton in ‘01 pardoned me
Finally… (it was over)

Was just a Brainwashed Tool, the Hydra was so cool
Tania born from Patty Hearst, vainly
Was just a Brainwashed Tool, the Hydra was so cool
Tania born from Patty Hearst, vainly

Stock, Stock, Stock, Stock
-holm Syndrome with Patty Hearst

Stock, Stock, Stock, Stock
-holm Syndrome with Patty Hearst

Heiress!
Patty Hearst
Heiress!
Patty Hearst
Heiress!
Patty Hearst
Heiress!
VICTIM


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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 3.8
How Funny: 3.8
Overall Rating: 3.8

Total Votes: 12

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   3
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 3
 
 2   0
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 0
 
 3   1
 1
 1
 
 4   0
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 5   8
 8
 8
 

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