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Song Parodies -> "11""

Original Song Title:

"Judas"

Original Performer:

Lady Gaga

Parody Song Title:

"11""

Parody Written by:

Robert D. Arndt Jr.

The Lyrics

I thought I would take advantage of the Subway footlong conspiracy and lawsuit from Sacramento (where I live)!!!
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa
Hey, it’s only 11”

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa
Hey, it’s only 11”

11“!
Inch pinched
11“!
Inch pinched
11“!
Inch pinched
11“!
NOT FOOTLONG!!!

Eating at Subway, I am hungry
Their “footlongs” always satisfied my needs
Measuring the bread would be insane
But after many counts, length is still the same

The sub‘s cut-down, sub‘s cut down, down
An inch missing found, inch missing found

[Chorus]
I’m just a paying fool, this rip-off’s not so cool
‘Cause it‘s still just 11“, false advertising
I’m just a paying fool, this rip-off’s not so cool
‘Cause it‘s still just 11“, false advertising

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa
Hey, it’s only 11”

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa
Hey, it’s only 11”

11“!
Inch pinched
11“!
Inch pinched
11“!
Inch pinched
11“!
NOT FOOTLONG!!!

I find this new-found fact disturbing
All the “footlongs” I have ordered for decades
Loss of inch, condiments is sick
Subway’s easy way to save some money!

The sub‘s cut-down, sub‘s cut down, down
An inch missing found, inch missing found

I’m just a paying fool, this rip-off’s not so cool
‘Cause it‘s still just 11“, false advertising
I’m just a paying fool, this rip-off’s not so cool
‘Cause it‘s still just 11“, false advertising

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa
Hey, it’s only 11”

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa
Hey, it’s only 11”

11“!
Inch pinched
11“!
Inch pinched
11“!
Inch pinched
11“!
NOT FOOTLONG!!!

[Bridge]
In the most practical sense,
The missing inch just costs cents
Famed franchise, cutting expense, is so unkind
But what this represents
Is loss of trust I suspect
Some patrons taking offense,
Will go somewhere else over time

I wanna buy you,
But Quizno’s pulling me away from you
5-buck was a value,
“Footlong” was the lie I clung to
It’s not true!

I’m just a paying fool, this rip-off’s not so cool
‘Cause it‘s still just 11“, false advertising
I’m just a paying fool, this rip-off’s not so cool
‘Cause it‘s still just 11“, false advertising

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa
Hey, it’s only 11”

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa
Hey, it’s only 11”

11“!
Inch pinched
11“!
Inch pinched
11“!
Inch pinched
11“!
NOT FOOTLONG!!!
Note: Subway claims that the measurements of bread might be off due to improper baking at some locations. But the measurements so far are consistant with 11" measured initially at 17 separate locations and now hundreds!!! If this proves true of the majority of Subway's 39,000 locations, now way the largest franchise will live it down.

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Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 7

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