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Song Parodies -> "Clowns Are Freaks"

Original Song Title:

"Down On Me"

Original Performer:


Parody Song Title:

"Clowns Are Freaks"

Parody Written by:


The Lyrics

Part of my World Go Boom self-challenge (as was Improvised Stew, but as dreary songs like that take the energy out of me when I parody them, I forgot to mark it as such). I really don't like clowns. I'm not actually scared of them (I'm more scared of spiders and falling over and splitting my head open), but like that's stopped me before. Enjoy!
I hate 'em, yes, I really hate 'em
They're way too cheery, jumpin'
High, I bet they're high on somethin'
Circus, I won't be going, if they're showin' clowns, not buyin'
Joker and Pennywise, that's what I see when they're smilin'
(Hate their clownin')
Scary, scary (Don't like 'em, buddy)
Freaky, freaky
Creepy, creepy clowns, clowns
(I know, I know clowns are)
Scary, scary (I know clowns are)
Freaky, freaky
Creepy, creepy clowns...

OK, these creepers with the giant shoes are freakin' me way the hell out
Somethin' 'bout their painted smiles, it makes me wanna punch 'em out
No matter what their expression, their grin's always poppin' out
Ev'rything they say is filtered through a quite obnoxious shout
They're freaky
They're too bloody happy
And that freaky make-up, too uncanny valley
Even when they juggle, juggle, juggle
I just struggle no-no-not to freak and pummel
They're just scum 'n' need a punchin'
(Honk honk honk honk)
They-they've got giant feet
That's just so unnat'ral
And I can't believe
That people find them funny, I-I chatter my teeth
I'm really glad I don't have to meet them on the streets

I hate those bloody clowns, they're too freaky for me
Scary all around, who still enjoys these creeps?
There's films like It around, they still make money
Why are they still around, all them clowns are freaks
Oh yes, them clowns are freaks
All them clowns are freaks
Damn clowns scare me
All them clowns are creeps
Whenever they're in town
I freak out instantly
Man, ev'rybody knows that them clowns are freaks
Yeah, them clowns are freaks

Ruin parties with their gaudy
Outfits and obnoxious grin
Their party tricks are old as shit
I think that clowns should be a sin
The time when they were fine has passed
They're useless and annoying as
They're just a pain in the ass
But how have they managed to last
I just wished they'd g-g-go
With their stupid fr-fr-fros
Afros are cool, that I know
But clowns do not deserve 'em, no
They're terrible, unbearable
Deplorable, despicable
Clown doctors are the biggest low
Sure won't make me feel better, yo
No matter the sitch
Their smiles still eat shit
Anger that I'm feelin', feelin'
Though my pants are fillin', fillin'
Fear leads to anger, or so says Yoda
Hate then comes after
So I'm suff'rin, suff'rin'

I hate those bloody clowns, they're so creepy to me
Nightmares all around, who still finds them funny?
There's guys like Joker 'round, they still make money
Why are they still around, all them clowns are creeps
Oh yes, them clowns are creeps
All them clowns are creeps
Damn clowns scare me
All them clowns are freaks
Whenever they're in town
I wig out instantly
Man, ev'rybody knows that them clowns are creeps
Yeah, them clowns are creeps

You see entertainers
I see freaky monsters
You think that they're harmless
Think I need a shotgun
If you think they're funny
In a retro fashion
I may think you're wrong, but
It's still you're opinion

Back to hell, I'll send 'em
And I really wanna
'Cause they're askin' for it
Can't stand it no longer
They're just too damn freaky
Demons with red noses
They can't sway me with their
Water-spraying roses

Clowns, I can't stand 'em, you see
And they're still around, scare the shit out of me
And lots of others too, too, too

I hate those bloody clowns, they're too scary for me
Back to hell, they're bound, if they get close to me
There's guys like Ronald 'round, and they seem happy
But when you turn around, back to being creeps
Oh yes, them clowns are freaks
All them clowns are freaks
Damn clowns scare me
All them clowns are creeps
Whenever they're in town
I flip out instantly
Man, ev'rybody knows that them clowns are freaks
Yeah, them clowns are freaks
Wow, references to Kim Possible and Star Wars in the same verse? Crazy.

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 13

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   13

User Comments

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Meriadoc - July 23, 2012 - Report this comment
I think it's a shame no one else commented, 'cus you've put a lot of work in here, and this could not have been easy to pace. But you did it excellently. Favorite line: water spraying roses.

And now you wanna know what's scarier than the clowns? I d'loaded the OS and I liked it. Now that's really SCARY!
Peregrin - July 24, 2012 - Report this comment
Agreed, lot of attention paid to pacing here - especially impressive to me given the OS just sounds like a cacophony of random sounds, but then again I am old and cranky!Merry, regarding your last comment, you need to go back to the doc and get him to adjust your dosage :)
Matthias - August 11, 2012 - Report this comment
You were really able to establish your fear of clowns a lot more in this parody than your Coldplay one because there are so many more lines but I don't know I kinda hate the OS so I like the Coldplay one a little bit more than this one.
Porfle Popnecker - August 16, 2012 - Report this comment
I was able to read between the lines here and gather that you don't completely like clowns.
Max Power - August 23, 2012 - Report this comment
Clowns are creepy and this parody confirms it. You juggled but in the end, you succeeded.
Blaydeman - August 27, 2012 - Report this comment
(SOTM) As you know,I too have used the fear of clowns (coulrophobia) as a basis for a parody. It's a fascinating phobia that goes back for generations and is referenced in multiple pop culture sources. I've actually done a little research about this subject and it turns out infants and young children are frightened by clowns' masks and faces because they are abnormal in shape and color. A bit ironic that clowns were designed to entertain children, but their mere appearance. Figures. Great parody in any case.
Abbott Skelding - August 30, 2012 - Report this comment
Nice work! Great job with the pacing (even if I couldn't stand the OS) but you made this spoof really funny! 555 more red noses
Arwen - August 31, 2012 - Report this comment
SOTM...I never think clowns are creepy until someone details for me all the ways that they are creepy...and then I'm creeped out. hahaha. I liked this!

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