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Song Parodies -> "Don't LARP Now"

Original Song Title:

"Don't Start Now"

Original Performer:

Dua Lipa

Parody Song Title:

"Don't LARP Now"

Parody Written by:

the_conqueror_of_parodies

The Lyrics

Part of my "Something to Believe In" self-challenge. There are times when it's alright to dress up like a wizard and pretend to blow up orcs. This is not one of 'em...
Bad time for fantasy, please

I know you might hate me, maybe
You should change your plans a touch
It might make a great scene, crazy
Is how you'll look to ev'ryone
I'm all for roleplayin', but I'm simply sayin'
Not ev'ryone's gamin', moron, so

Bad time for fantasy, please, we should move our party
To somewhere where there's trees and not the risk of cops, please

Don't dress up and waltz out
In your elf ears, won't end well now
A bad place for the sounds
Of swords made of foam, let's leave now

Don't be the guy who tried to
Kill the orc who's just some guy
And don't try to lie, dude, 'cause I've viewed
The footage of that one bad time
Where Boban the Fighter tried to squash the drider
And then paid a fine for her fall, so

Bad time for fantasy, please, you'd better say sorry
To the shop owner, you cracked his door with your fall, geez
Dope, dope, dope

Don't dress up and waltz out
With your big staff, won't end well now
Public place, not allowed
To play-act, they'll throw your suit out (your suit out, bad suit)

Dumb, dumb
Don't waltz out, out, out
Don't dress up, up, up
Don't LARP now (oh)
Dumb, dumb
Don't waltz out, out
Give nerds a bad name, you asshole, so

Bad time for fantasy, please, not wimpin' out, hardly
Just that there's a place for that, ain't the market stalls, please

Don't dress up (don't dress up) and waltz out (and waltz out)
With your foam sword, won't end well now (end well now)
Please refrain (please refrain), put that down (put that down)
Crowd will only mock you, I've found, hahaha (so)

Dumb, dumb
Don't waltz out, out, out
Don't dress up, up, up
Looks insane, looks insane (so)
Dumb, dumb
Don't waltz out, out, out
Don't dress up, up, up
Walk away, walk away, oh

I don't think I'll ever take part in a LARP, mainly because it'd kinda break the immersion when I inevitably take my phone out to check the rules every twenty seconds.

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 3.3
How Funny: 3.0
Overall Rating: 3.3

Total Votes: 3

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
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 2   0
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 3   0
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 4   1
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 5   1
 1
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