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Song Parodies -> "Poor Stance"

Original Song Title:

"One Dance"

Original Performer:

Drake ft. Wizkid & Kyla

Parody Song Title:

"Poor Stance"

Parody Written by:


The Lyrics

Part of my "Into Pieces" self-challenge. When one is getting the shit kicked out of you, clearly the most important thing to consider is whether you're getting quality shit-kicking...
Bu-uddy-yy, don't li-ike your style

Punched in the face, huge pain, okay
But your technique i-is lame
Might be safer to let you still remain
Fightin' this crappy-y way
Can't leave that be
So take a day o-off from kickin' my-y knees
I sa-ay you need some tutori-in', Steve
Oka-ay? O-Okay

That's right, my-y, you've a poo-oor stance
Way you're fightin' me-e, it's plain ba-a-ad
Should take ti-ime to trai-ain, bro-o
No more failin' basic-ass ho-o-olds o-on me
My-y, you've a poo-oor stance
You hit my kidne-eys like that? Da-a-amn
Take some ti-ime to trai-ain, bro-o
No more usin' awkward-ass ho-o-olds o-on me

Bu-uddy-yy, don't li-ike your style

It's plain sci-ience
Lead with the wrong foot, your fi-ightin'
Will suffer greatly, need gui-uidance
Cause I'm just not feelin' fri-ightened
You're not holdin' that wrench ti-ightly
Bet my skull won't end up divi-idin', I
Know it'll end u-up flyin'
Tha-at just wastes time

Roll my eyes, my-y, you've a poo-oor stance
Very plain to see-ee, it's so ba-a-ad
Spend some ti-ime and trai-ain, bro-o
Can slip out of all of your ho-o-olds o-on me
My-y, you've a poo-oor stance
You twist my pinky like that? Da-amn
Take a hi-ike and trai-ain, bro-o
Badly usin' wrest-l-in' ho-o-olds o-on me

Soundin' like a jerk while I critique your fightin'
I like the way that you sent my tooth flyin'
Oh, your energy's shinin'
Sorry, sorry, sorry, keep findin'
Sorry, sorry, keep findin' more faults
Sorry, sorry, sorry, keep findin'
Oh, your faults keep arisin'
Sorry, sorry, keep findin' more

You may sti-i-ill hu-urt me with e-ev'ry blow
Bu-ut I'm still co-onsciou-ious, bro-o
Could knock me down with o-one hit, so
Go-ot to ma-ake a-a ca-a-all
Trai-ain, trai-ain, trai-ain
Trai-ain, trai-ain, trai-ain, trai-ain
Oh, I know that you're tryin' (trai-ain, trai-ain, trai-ain)
Better, better, not shinin', man (trai-ain, trai-ain, trai-ain, trai-ain)
Won't knock me down (better, better train)
Please knock me down (better, better train)
Try, knock me down (better, better train)

My-y, what a poo-oor stance (trai-ain, trai-ain, trai-ain)
When you're kickin' me-e in the a-a-ass (trai-ain, trai-ain, trai-ain, trai-ain)
True that I-I'm not trai-ained, thou-ough (trai-ain)
So demandin' better is bo-o-old o-of me (trai-ain, trai-ain, trai-ain, trai-ain)
My-y, what a poo-oor stance
Want a better breed of kick-a-ass
This is shi-ite, plain sa-ad, bro-o
Because I want cool stories to-o-old o-of me

Five months later "I say, sir, that was some quality ass-kickin' you just performed on me! Now if you'll excuse me, I'm just going to pass out for a second" *flump*

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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.7
How Funny: 4.0
Overall Rating: 4.0

Total Votes: 3

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