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Song Parodies -> "Do This Slide"

Original Song Title:

"Toosie Slide"

Original Performer:

Drake

Parody Song Title:

"Do This Slide"

Parody Written by:

the_conqueror_of_parodies

The Lyrics

Part of my "Something to Believe In" self-challenge. Hot new dance trends don't just emerge from the ether, you know? You gotta work at it!
Try to recall that sequence
Was it the left hand next? Brain is leakin'
My shit ain't poppin', but I need it
Got a dance, hopin' that you'll stay to see it
Can't remember how I did it, was it right foot up, left foot, slide?
Left foot up, right foot, slide?
Wrote the damn directions, why did my brain let 'em slide? Ayy
Don't leave, watch me slide, ayy

Tryna make a dance, you see, don't
Talk or chat, it's a distraction
That was rude, not impassioned
Hard to think here, but to snap? That was wrong
Still, I'm tryna make a dance, you see, so
Need a plan, these things don't happen
To start a craze or a fashion
You can't look like an unsure and sad dimwit
Come on, neurons, start connectin', was it left foot up, right foot, slide?
Right foot up, left foot, slide?
Hopin' that ain't backwards, 'cause the world won't let that one slide, ayy
If I botch my slide, ayy (looks crap)

Can't take the world by storm if my limbs flop, ayy, yeah
I want the people to jam and not mock, whoa, yeah
How did this part go? Do the shoulders bop? Do they not?
I look like a cartoon geek, a real clot, whoa, yeah
Should stop, whoa, yeah, I won't stop
I'll retry a lot until my legs have lots of pain in knots
I'll retry the movements 'til my arms wanna fall right off
Shit, I think I heard a little pop, I hope that wasn't me
I can see you twitch, you got some thoughts for me
But don't tell me what to do, buddy
Never seen a group meme credit, please, I'm just sayin'

Must compose my own sequence
Do I grab my ass yet? Brain is leakin'
I won't be stoppin', eat my tea quick
Got a dance, can't waste any time to eat shit
Can't remember how I did it, was it right foot up, right foot, slide?
Left foot up, left foot, slide?
All I can recall is at some point, part of me slides, ayy
Hope it's a good slide, ayy (looks crap)

Do this slide that I made up, would be nice
Can put your own spin on it, 'cause that's how a meme survives
Takin' up all my time, hope I can get it done in time
'Fore the app I'm usin' becomes passé, relic of old times, whoa, yeah
Can't describe the pressure that I'm puttin' on myself, yeah
So inconsequential, so it's a self-imposed hell, yeah
No-one's put trust in me to dance, let alone dance well, whoa
No-one's got trust in me, won't care if it fails to swell, yeah
So low expectations, don't know my zeal
"He'll give up this nonsense, he's got no hope for real"
They might have a point if I can't get this sealed

Tryna lock up this sequence, yeah
Do I bow or clap next? Brain is leakin'
Hopin' nobody ever sees this
Got a dance, but the first draft can't get leaked, shit
Gotta work it out, was it left foot up, left foot, slide?
Right foot up, right foot, slide?
And just how long should I perform any of these slides? Ayy
Don't want too-long slides, ayy

Tryna make a dance, you see, don't
Mock my balance, know it's bad, but (bad, but)
It could be the hot fashion (fashion)
To look like a total prat, not far off (not far off)
Still, I'm tryna make a dance, you see, so
Please don't chat, nice words or sassin' (sassin')
Thought train needs some fuel, ain't happ'nin (happ'nin')
When you say how I look like a mad dipshit
I know that, let me keep thinkin', was it right foot up, left foot, slide?
Left foot up, right foot, slide?
Show me that vid later, I don't care about Drake's slide
Looks crap

Even if I wasn't in the position of spontaneously coming up with the same dance steps as Drake, I wouldn't care about Drake's slide. So much of Drake's recent material has been so boring and blaaarrgh that even the low-effort horns in Laugh Now Cry Later were a much-needed pep-up...which I'm only now just realising that both the horns and the flow of that song were basically cribbed from J.Cole's Middle Child. Still, better that than the ten millionth Future knockoff.

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Total Votes: 1

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