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Song Parodies -> "Super weird ej*c*late"

Original Song Title:

"Superhero Jagganath"

Original Performer:

Diablo Swing Orchestra

Parody Song Title:

"Super weird ej*c*late"

Parody Written by:

Peter Andersson a.k.a K1chyd

The Lyrics

A man's gotta do what a man's gotta do to pay the bills, so I signed up for the local sperm bank the other day. Imagine my surprise when the doc not only called me back about the findings in the microscopic analysis, but also offered me good money to show up again as quickly as manly possible.

A YouTube version of the original song can currently be found here.
Kids might spring from me
With human out-side visibly
I've got crazy seed
The doctor said I could a-breed a carneval
Because of what she found on me down cellular

Yes, my sperm is cashable
I have invaluable - ejaculate
Yes, I've Alien genomes
And Flintstone chromosomes - so says their charts!

Got some hound, got some mime
Tell med please that's only slime
Cruel, but nature's given me
Also rock, and some slash
guns and roses in my stash
In my ancestrally - ejaculate

Yes, I have invaluable
DNA candy-ble - ejaculate
Sure, there's some Neanderthal
And I'll be clear to all - there's lotsa Nerd

It looks like Myrrh
Or Chimichurr-i
When I come

one part orch ejaculate - two parts dork ejaculate - pepper pot ejaculate - sumo shot ejaculate - soaked in bars ejaculate - compact.rar ejaculate - wunderbaum ejaculate - krusty clown ejaculate

And chocolate!

Furthermore my seed's
Now marked "Grade Swede" genetically
Turnip mash in spades
I've had with meatballs maybe for too many days
And maybe Vodka Absolut have messed my "boys"

I'm spanking high, their lab's top find
And when about to jizz I hear KA-CHING capitalized
And when I'm done, THEY'RE satisfied
And as my monkey's drained my bankroll grows in size

I have quite sensational
Money exchangeable - ejaculate
Just extract the pokemon
And poppycock genome - and slimy parts

Scattershot ejaculate
Skittled spots ejaculate
Bertie Bott's ejaculate
Super weird ejaculate

Tater tots ejaculate
And whatnot ejaculate
Super duper weird ejaculate

I may not be dateable
But I've the greatest balls' - ejaculate

Sure, I'm prone to blundering
And post cum slumbering - so says their charts!

Paydirt in my 'jaculate!

© Peter Andersson. (This one was written for the current round of ONE WEEK NOTICE challenge, this time hosted by Agrimorfee. You too can be a host and help us save Amiright, or for starters simply join a round for your own fun - details are to be found under "Amiright Events" on the front page).

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 3.9
How Funny: 3.9
Overall Rating: 3.9

Total Votes: 7

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   2
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   5

User Comments

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Agrimorfee - March 16, 2018 - Report this comment
OMG. To think that it has all cum to this!
Matthias - March 16, 2018 - Report this comment
Wow! This was phenomenal! So dirty and yet hilarious with all of the different kinds... Bertie Bott’s was my favorite because I’m a Harry Potter fan but it made me think... Is ejaculate a jelly bean flavor if they are indeed EVERY flavor? I sure hope not but vomit is... Soooo who knows? I’ll need to ask JK Rowling that question if I ever get to meet her
Claude Prez - March 16, 2018 - Report this comment
Yeah, you really teste'd yourself here Peter - truly magnificent and going above and beyond with all the weird chorus variations and whatnot. I was thinking of attempting a "Super Creepy Jabba Hutt" idea for this round but found the OS too imposing. Kudos to you 3 Musketeers for gettin' it done week after week - gonna use "extract the pokemon" on my wife, I'll let you know how it goes
Offended - March 18, 2018 - Report this comment
Nothing but cheap smut. Unoriginal too.
Peter Andersson - March 18, 2018 - Report this comment
Thanks Agrimorfee, Matthias and Claude.

@ Offended: I'm glad to get to hear your recognition of this as unoriginal cheap smut - there's nothing quite like a quantity smut experts feedback on a subject like this - greatly appreciated! ;-)
paul robinson - November 03, 2018 - Report this comment
DKTOS, Peter, but you had me smiling and cracking up throughout. I think this one was OK because outside of, well, "ejaculating" all over the place the rest of the language was just clever imagery.

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