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Song Parodies -> "Artsy Prat"

Original Song Title:

"Heart Attack"

Original Performer:

Demi Lovato

Parody Song Title:

"Artsy Prat"

Parody Written by:

the_conqueror_of_parodies

The Lyrics

Part of my Pop Danthology 2013 self-challenge. Getting an art commission should be simple. It's all "I'll pay you to draw a thing!" "Thing drawn" "Sweet! *cash*", right? Not when the artist insists on taking the piece places the dude with the cash doesn't want 'em to go...
Pardon my poor French he-ere, but
What is this shit? What have you done?
When I offered my cash
You swore you weren't some artsy pra-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-at

Love to buy commi-ission works online
Gettin' one pic done in te-en styles
Never had trouble gettin' what I want
But when it comes to you, you screwed the whole thing up
You failed to ca-a-are
All of my critiques were i-igno-ored
Don't claim "not fai-ai-air"
Just said I won't come back to your store
Look, you-ou're actin' like an arrogant jerk
Su-ure, your way is the best, plea-ease
The-e wo-orst customer service
You made Batman look like cra-ap

Pro-oportio-ions blo-o-o-o-o-o-ow
And the colours suck, I-I wo-on't pay, no-o-o-o-o-o-o
It's shite, pardon my poor French the-ere, but
"Artistic licence"? That's just dumb
You don't deserve my cash
Because you're such an artsy pra-a-a-a-a-a-at
An absolute shit a-artsy pra-a-a-a-a-a-at
Don't want bus'ness with artsy pra-ats

Get that there's a thing called "personal style"
But to change the pose and outfit outri-ight?
That's bein' a dick, a-and it doe-oesn't help
To cite those who think that your work excels
What's with the hai-ai-air?
You gave Robin a-a jheri curl
And what's that the-e-ere?
That's the wrong outfit, it doe-oesn't wo-ork
"I ne-ever liked Tim" you arrogant jerk
Re-eplicate that screencap, du-ude
To-old you-ou, don't be so stupid
Don't you want your friggin' ca-ash?

You-ou botched the-e po-o-o-o-o-o-ose
And the shadin' sucks, I-I wo-on't pay, no-o-o-o-o-o-o
Plain shite, pardon my poor French the-ere, but
"Tried somethin' diff'rent"? That's just dumb
Didn't do what I asked
Because you're such an artsy pra-a-a-a-a-a-at
An complete, total a-artsy pra-a-a-a-a-a-at
I hate dealin' with artsy prats

I'm not bein' picky, you du-u-unce
Can't cover your ass for your flubs
You broke Ba-atgi-irl's spi-ine in twain (don't want her in pain)
"That's just how my artwork is done"
Hence why I made it clear last month
To not do that, dumb-brai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ai-ain

"Li-iked the ske-etch"? No-o-o-o-o-o-o
I brought all this up ba-ack the-en, you do-o-o-o-o-o-ope
Don't lie, pardon my poor French he-ere, but
This piece you've done is pure shit, bud
Won't pay a cent for that
Because you're such an artsy pra-a-ee-a-at
Ignored my instructio-ions, you twa-a-a-a-a-a-at (su-uch a twa-at)
Not gonna cut you any slack, ma-a-a-a-a-a-an (oh)
For "a huge workload", that's lame cra-a-a-a-a-a-ap
Just 'fess up: you're an artsy pra-at

This is not why I've never paid for a commission. That's because I never had the cash. And I'm wary about money transactions over the interwebz.

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Pacing: 4.5
How Funny: 4.5
Overall Rating: 4.5

Total Votes: 2

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