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Song Parodies -> "A Douche At The LAN"

Original Song Title:

"When I Was Your Man"

Original Performer:

Bruno Mars

Parody Song Title:

"A Douche At The LAN"

Parody Written by:

the_conqueror_of_parodies

The Lyrics

Part of my "Living The Fantasy" self-challenge. There's always that one a-hole ruining every LAN session. I assume anyway, I haven't been to many and the ones I was at I spent all of the time away from the computers. Um...parody!
With friends, and we're playin' a popular shooter now
But there's always some asshole buggerin' up the game
Killin' guys on his team cause he's pissed at a little slowdo-o-o-own
I'd call him Leeroy Jenkins, he's not wo-orth that name
He's that much of a dou-ou-ou-ou-ou-ouche

Mmm, no fun when someone kills alli-ies
Which idiot brought him over?
Was it you, Sta-a-an?
Keeps tellin' us 'bout his boners
When we're ma-akin' plans
Not the life of the party
When most of the time he respawn ca-a-a-a-amps
Simple fact of gami-in':
Always one prick shows up at the LAN

Online, on consoles, he keeps screwin' up each game
We've got signs ev'rywhere sayin' "no teabaggin'", ri-ight
I'm no better, but I bet he can't spell "co-ope-e-era-ate", no-o-o-o
Mission calls for rifles but he's u-usin' knives
Watch that flashbang, you foo-oo-oo-oo-oo-ool

Mmm, that schmuck, that chuck just ma-a-ade us bli-i-ind
This guy never follows orders
Ignores the pla-a-an
Always nicks the rocket launche-e-er
When we nee-eed stealth, man
Also, he's always fartin'
And won't chip in for the pizza ta-a-a-a-ab
Wish he was departin'
And we might have a much better LAN

Always that je-erk
What makes it wo-o-o-orse is that at games he suuu-u-u-uuu-u-u-uuu-u-ucks
Oh, if at the games he was an ace
Then maybe his douchiness we'd tolerate
But as it turns out he blo-o-o-o-o-o-ows

So next time y'all come over
Please don't invi-ite that twa-a-at
Always a sore lose-e-er
So his ass is banned
Absence should make us happy
And we play better when i-in a goo-ood mood, ma-an
No more of him pullin' the plug
When losin' a match
Throw him out if he dares show up
No pricks at this LAN

The flashbang thing is a reference to Spoony's Let's Play of SWAT 4, where his AI teammates kept throwing said flashbangs into the door instead of the room, causing him to scream "AAAH, YOU FOOL!". Hilarity ensued.

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