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Song Parodies -> "Took a Dive"

Original Song Title:

"Look Alive"

Original Performer:

BlocBoy JB ft. Drake

Parody Song Title:

"Took a Dive"

Parody Written by:

the_conqueror_of_parodies

The Lyrics

Part of my "Turnin' It Up" self-challenge. Throwing the big match! Not the most honourable choice...
Blame me? I just did my job (yeah, yeah), ooh
Yeah (ooh), awesome boxer, awesome boxer (ooh), word
Fake bad boxer, fake bad boxer (boxer (ooh), not bad)
Yeah (hey)

Didn't want this but I took a dive (dive), took a dive
Never thought that in my life I would have to do it, right (hurts, hurts, hurts)
I felt it was wrong (huh) to pretend I didn't try (yeah, awful, yeah)
Really hard to give a fight all the strength that I would like (real fight, yeah)
Cause I really hate to lie, I'm afraid my hands were tied
Don't mean lit'rally, you guys, though I do understand why
That would be the thing you'd think, it would be hard to fight (hah)
When your arms are forced (hah) behind your back, but from the point, we slide

Ayy, ayy, wanna knock him down, man
I'm a punch nut, won't last the first round, man
Now I'm down, man, hope I don't get caught, man
I'd cop so much shit that I'd never get another title shot
Man, I'm not to blame, man, a little picture hit the web, so
I'm gettin' paid, man, to make it look like I'm real crap now
It's not the same crap you get in wrestlin', expect that now
Allowed to fake that, but in boxin', that's on you

This feels awful, but still I took a dive (dive), took a dive
Threw my win streak to the side just to let the blackmail die (hurts, hurts, hurts)
Oh hell, it was wrong to give in to compromise (yeah, awful, yeah)
Just so that the pic that I featured in taken that night (bad night, yeah)
Doesn't hit more than one site, hate to let my good rep die
Although one could say that by losin' an important fight
Still means my rep takes a hit, but I can win more times (hah)
Than I can remove (hah) the image of myself dressed in tight-

Shit, close to (to) losin' you (you)
Let's switch up the subject (word): fr-fr-friggin' hard to lose (to lose)
Fa-fa-far from small potatoes (huh?), hard to fake a missed punch, dude (always looks awkward)
The-the-the method's rather intricate, your blows can't look too crude (rrah)
Ma-ma-make a breeze, should be feelin' it (feelin' it)
O-On the foe's face, can't look safe when you're missin' it (you're missin' it)
Pop a couple, 'bout twenty percent (huh?)
D-D-Don't make the score look way too damn one-sided (yeah, yeah, yeah)
And when your mug's battered in (battered in)
Don't-don't mess around, act smashed a bit (smashed a bit)
Don't flop right down like a bad alcoholic (uh)
That's for the end, cause the fans must buy all of it (flop)
Have to take it, stay on my knees (huh, on my knees)
Until my face looks like a lump of raw meat (lump of raw meat)
Then I can stay on the floor once he wind-up decks me (wind-up decks me)
I hope the crowd bought the fakeness or I'll feel like shit, see (shit, see, whole lot)

Feel like scum, but still I took a dive (dive), took a dive
It's been way more than a while since I've had to fake a fight (hurts, hurts, hurts)
Might well look quite off, I'm so rusty at this, right (yeah, awful, yeah)
It's the most unwanted vibe: the uncanny valley fight (off fight, yeah)
This whole farce kills me inside, but I won't admit the lies
Outside of this song which I'm singin' to myself, that's right
I may make my cash with hits to my head lots, but I'm (hah)
Not an absolute (hah) idiot, won't admit I faked a fight (cause I feel awful)

My original plan was "Book a Flight", but then I realised I have no idea how booking a flight works. I'd research it, but parody research on boring real life things is my anti-jam.

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