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Song Parodies -> "Parafisted Blob"

Original Song Title:

"Prisoner Of Love"

Original Performer:

Axel Rudi Pell

Parody Song Title:

"Parafisted Blob"

Parody Written by:

Peter Andersson a.k.a K1chyd

The Lyrics

There's more to it, but the main things you need to know about Vogon Poetry if you haven't read the Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy or spoofs thereof is that it's supposed to be agonizingly atrocious on or over the brink of brain torture to normal sentient beings, written and/or read from a highly emotional viewpoint and that it should consist of at least one word of space alien origin (i.e made up, though not necessarily pure jabberwocky). Furthermore, it doesn't hurt enough unless there's a somewhat hidden metaphysical imagery with rhythmic devices to counterpoint the surrealism of the underlying metaphor and the vogonity which contrives through the medium of the verse structure to sublimate this, transcend that, and come to terms with the fundamental dichotomies of the other.

A YouTube version of the original song can currently be found here:
Old sphincters are numbing
As they grieve with emo sounds
My warts trembling eerie
As I groan
Bereft your pout embrace
And chewing fleas unkind
No way to kowtow
Wherewithals confined

Shrill were your poise
All over my zen

It wasn't hauled in
Blorting out the flames
Worn out and sprawling
I'm a parafisted blob

Parafisted blob

My feelings dismembered
Like the zarked slime that you spat
Bombard my crabs and tortoise
Like the fnorks of aftermath
T'was time for a bender
But glue groked my balls apart
As my life was being pwned
I stayed for abetted arts

Swilled are the loins
And bloated again

I think it's stying
Crying worms of shame
It was a short fling
I'm a parafisted slob

I'm on a zapped string
Frying rooked and lame
Still feel the nose ring
I'm a parafisted blob

Solo - Then repeat chorus until your major intestine leaps straight up through your neck and throttles your brain…

© Peter Andersson - I mean, really, what else could I have done here with a cliched title like "prisoner of love"? ;-)

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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.0
How Funny: 4.5
Overall Rating: 4.5

Total Votes: 4

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   3

User Comments

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Old Man Ribber - September 03, 2010 - Report this comment
Superbly Vogonesque! Just don't demolish the Earth to make room for the hyperspatial express route, ok? As a parody, this is "Prefect" (spelling intentional!). ;D
Below Average Dave - September 03, 2010 - Report this comment
Oh my. . .what an idea. . .the first line got me laughing, and the rest followed it nicely--all I can say is that is very different--in a good way.
Christie Marie M - September 03, 2010 - Report this comment
Good thing I don't have to deal with parasitic blobs! A hilarious parody. Enjoyed it lots. 555!
Tommy Turtle - September 03, 2010 - Report this comment
Still all Greek to me, Peter, but FWIW, you're included in a group tribute *planned* for next week, 10 Sept. Chucky time. You know how plans can change, but it's already written...

btw, you missed yourself in a *massive* tribute -- very high on the list, of course -- back in February:
Peter Andersson - September 04, 2010 - Report this comment
Ribber: I won't demolish Earth, I promise, I only aim to demolish brains...

Dave: Thanks!

Marie: As a woman you probably have your hands full dealing with parasitic guys...

Tommy Turtle - Do you like Monty Python? If so I can almost guarantee that you'll very much enjoy Douglas Adams' "The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy" as well, they're from the same tradition of social satire and bureaucracy-mocking and apart from the story's exterior settings it has no more in common with science fiction a la Star Trek/Wars than your average Flying Circus sketch/scene.

It is also filled with wonderful wordplay of the kind you exercise in yourself, with sentences like "the Vogon Constructor Fleet hung in the air in much the same way that bricks don't."

But don't just take my word for it, the whole first book is available online, including the most famous and quoted passage where our hero Arthur Dent first encounter Vogon Poetry:

I will post this comment on one of your parodies too to make sure you see it.
Tommy Turtle - September 04, 2010 - Report this comment
Saw it; thanks. (replied there) Redundancy is always a good idea....

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