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Song Parodies -> "The Kites"

Original Song Title:

"The Nights"

Original Performer:

Avicii

Parody Song Title:

"The Kites"

Parody Written by:

the_conqueror_of_parodies

The Lyrics

A man reminisces on his...less-than-pleasant experiences with a common childhood pastime.
Hey
I'm not fond of wind, I fear, it reminds me of younger years
When I had tried an old method of play (hey)
Won't deign to say it sucks, won't jeer, pretty sure it's crystal clear
The fault's with me for my confuzzled state
A spate of cartoons had sold me that upon a windy day
Should throw a piece of cloth up into space (hey)
Two sticks in tandem, some string on a spool and then you'll pray
That it won't fly right back in your face

Don't need to say the outcome wasn't nice
I wear this eyepatch for a reason
Ev'ryone told me that means more I should try
But no, the kites would never fly
At least not for me

Hey, hey
Hey, hey
Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh (hey, hey)
Oh-oh-oh
Hey, hey
Hey, hey
Hey, hey
Hey, hey

Won't zoom around the sky or clouds, as a child, could not work out
Why this base activity was hard
The kids right next to me had kites that soared, gave me tips which I kept stored
Inside my brain cause I would not depart
Nobody would dare cajole me to just pack up for the day
I'd get this damn thing airborne, one could say
That I was stubborn, but I would prefer a diff'rent phrase
Was determined to make this thing pay

Give up? No way, I'd get the technique right
Into the sky and not the tree branch
Ev'ryone told me it would work the next try
But no, the kites would never fly
At least not for me

Hey, hey
Hey, hey
Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh (hey, hey)
Those stupid kites (oh-oh-oh) would never fly
At least not for me
Hey, hey
Hey, hey
Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh (hey, hey)
Oh-oh-oh
Hey
Hey, hey
Hey, hey
Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh (hey, hey)
Oh-oh-oh
Hey, kites, I abhor thee

This is kinda like me, except I only tried the once and gave up, which means I don't think of kites when the wind blows. Also never got a kite to the eyeball. Did get a fly up my nose once.

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.2
How Funny: 4.4
Overall Rating: 4.4

Total Votes: 5

Voting Breakdown

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    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
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 3   0
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 4   0
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 5   4
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