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Song Parodies -> "editions"

Original Song Title:

"positions"

Original Performer:

Ariana Grande

Parody Song Title:

"editions"

Parody Written by:

the_conqueror_of_parodies

The Lyrics

Part of my "Something to Believe In" self-challenge. I told you last week, I'm back on my bullcrap again! The quirk this time is "putting all the 2020 songs in the 2010s category because there's no 2020s category yet". Anyway, speaking of returning old things, let's ramble about the concept of Super Extreme Maxi Ultra Limited Collector's Editions! Well, less "ramble about" and more "pity the poor sucker addicted to it all."
Spendin' all my money
Because you've got hooks in me and so it seems
That I am a total sucker for a new face
The content's not changed much, cover's new, mate (ah-ah, ah-ah)
So I must go (go), hope there's shelf space
'Cause I need

All of the editions from you
Nothin's really diff'rent but it's shiny and it's new
Can call me a dipshit, I can't say it's not true
Also it's limited, must have one of those few
Same-ass book, true, I'm a schmuck

Damn it, damn it
Film collection, I'm screwed (it's a fact that I'm screwed)
By themselves and in boxsets, got it
But this casin' is new (brand new)
Sometimes they've got a bonus cut scene which is okay
New blooper reel, they're fun, but there's no way (ah-ah, ah-ah-ah)
It's worth the dough (dough) that I must pay
But I need

All of the editions from you (oh-oh-oh)
Add to my collection, hopin' that I have the room
Each copy is diff'rent though the change is minute
Joy from each addition won't last that long, it's true
Still more from you, never quit, rude
Barely a revision, extra language, maybe two
To which I won't listen 'cause it's not what I do
Here for exhibition of my dumb displays, true
But I'm your fool, evil of you

I'm a big sucker, I know that's true (yeah)
But to stop, I have to, have to want to (mmm-mmm, mmm-mmm)
And it looks so neat, what I've accrued (what I've accrued)
Yeah, I've accrued shitloads of editions from you
Books, games and movies (yeah), Figuarts too (toys too)
Ev'ry time I wanna, wanna stop, you (mmm-mmm, mmm-mmm)
You go and release somethin' "brand new" (hot, "brand new" release)

Buyin' more editions from you
I'm someone with simple tastes and what I like is "new"
Put that word in real big font, I might just buy two (want it, want it)
Aware I'm a dimwit, don't have to tell me, dude (I know it's true)
I know it's true, but I blame you (ooh-ooh-oh-oh-oh)
Would my weird obsession be here without greedy tools (mmm, mmm, mmm)
Who love exploitation of the consumer fools (oh-oh)?
Who cares? Take my payment, gimme what you call "new" (I-I-I, that so-called "new")
Know that's not true, evil of you

Yeah
Mmm-ah-ah-ah-ah, yeah-eah-eah
Ah-ah (ah-ah), yeah-eah

But she's got a new hat!

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