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Song Parodies -> "Check Bond's Truly Dead"

Original Song Title:

"Check Yes Juliet"

Original Performer:

We the Kings

Parody Song Title:

"Check Bond's Truly Dead"

Parody Written by:

the_conqueror_of_parodies

The Lyrics

Rule #125 of the Evil Overlord List: Should I actually decide to kill the hero in an elaborate escape-proof deathtrap room (water filling up, sand pouring down, walls converging, etc.) I will not leave him alone five to ten minutes prior to "imminent" death, but will instead (finding a vantage point or monitoring camera) stick around and enjoy watching my adversary's demise.
Check Bond's truly dead, do you get me?
Yes, I know we just dropped a huge block
On his head, but he could still be fine
Check Bond's truly dead, his pulse tempo
Could be rocking out all allegro
Even after twenty-seven knives
He's a tough dude (I know, I know)
Don't just assume

Dumb, it's so dumb, it's jinxing, in fact
If you think each part of our plan worked, you prat (you total prat)
It's not that hard to just double-check, you see
Dumb, it's so dumb, I want him to be
Dead, not free

Check Bond's truly dead, I'll be waiting
Maybe chop him up while I'm pacing
Got no doubt that that bastard's still alive
Check Bond's truly dead, have him ground down
Into lots of chunks, might seem harsh now
But I just don't want the "I still live" surprise
Because this dude's (I know, I know)
Survived worse, true

Dumb, it's so dumb, but it's somehow fact
That lasers and sharks have not stopped his attack (stopped his attack)
One sniper mark have have stopped his misery
Dumb, it's so dumb, but he could still be
Live and free

I'm tired of this shite, I'm tired of this shite
My whole life
My stupid fears of "he'll get better" turn out to be right

Dumb, it's so dumb, but he's been intact
After blades real sharp were flung straight at his ass
Stretched legs apart with tight ropes, but he'll still leave
Dumb, it's so dumb, so just work with me
Dumb, it's so dumb, but all that I ask
Is tear him apart with your bare friggin' hands (bare friggin' hands)
Might be a farce that he'd still come after me
Dumb, it's so dumb, but this guy's a freak
Believe me
Believe me, believe me

Scott: Wait, aren't you even gonna watch them? They could get away!
Dr. Evil: No. I'm going to leave them alone and not actually witness them dying, I'm just gonna assume it all went to plan. Why?

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