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Song Parodies -> "Aches, Sole Blister"

Original Song Title:

"Hey, Soul Sister"

Original Performer:


Parody Song Title:

"Aches, Sole Blister"

Parody Written by:

John A. Barry

The Lyrics

Ache, ache, ache ache. . . .

No shin-splint sprain
or a broken toe is causing pain.
My shoe is starting to pester,
engendering a fester so unkind.

I need moonshine, or at least
a pint of ale or a glass of wine.
Foot and pavement collided
as down the street my steps guided. ..
Oxford ties that bind.

Ache, ache, ache ache. . . .

Aches, sole blister,
painful as a clyster
up the anus hole. . .ain’t so droll. . .
won’t be able much more to stroll.
Aches, sole blister,
painful as a fister
in the face, like a sharp right.

Shoes are shined, but that doesn’t mean
that they ain’t binding me.
Podiatric constriction
in addition to friction—they make me cry.
I’m so depressed—perhaps a small or large
particle had ingressed.

No relief from shoe; plight a-burgeons—belladonna
or some morphine; how I wanna anodyne!

Aches, sole blister,
painful as a clyster
or an active mole on a roll,
Gereing up to cornhole a vole.
Aches, sole blister,
painful as a fister
in the face, like a hard right.

I crave to be a slut for drugs,
like that fat and ugly mug who screams.
I’d be thankful for a slug
of straight Everclear glugged in one chug.

Shoe-free I should be podiatrically,
but the jammed things are glued to me—
toe jam acts stickily, adhesively.

Aches, sole blister,
painful as a clyster
up the drainage hole. . .can’t extol
what ails one so one cannot stroll.
Aches, sole blister,
painful as a fister
in the face. . .puts out my lights.
painful is this blister because I am so shoe-tight. . .

Too tight!!

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 2

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   2

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