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Song Parodies -> "Hey, Old Stripper"

Original Song Title:

"Hey, Soul Sister"

Original Performer:


Parody Song Title:

"Hey, Old Stripper"

Parody Written by:

The Lyrics

Do a barber pole dance to this recording by Robert Lund.

My dork friend Mike
Planned a bachelor party for tonight
He hired an entertainer
It seemed like a no-brainer
But be warned

When you arrived
The groom passed out and had to be revived alive
When your boss described his ladies
We'd assumed the term "late eighties"
Meant when you were born

Hey, old stripper
Shake it for the whipper-snappers here tonight
We fear the light
Your mothball scent is sheer delight
Hey, old stripper
Please don't break your hip er
Things just won't seem right


Blue-gray hair
It keeps falling out from everywhere you bend
Your assets: basset saggy
Please guard your special baggie
When you extend

I'm holdin' tears
'Cause you look like Madonna in her golden years
Nana, do you prefer
To shake your nooks and crannies
In boy shorts or granny panties?

Hey, old stripper
Even Jack the Ripper would be horrified
He'd never sign up for the ride
Hey, old stripper
Pray your girdle zipper
Will stay rusted shut

The way you can jitterbug!
Watch your pasties sweep the rug so clean
No, we won't pull your plug
You're just hopped up on arthritis drugs, it seems
You're a tribute to the senior class
Your show is literally a gas
Tonight we're gonna tap some As...percreme

Hey, old stripper
Ain't you got big tippers? 'Cause you're competent
A shame that you're incontinent
Hey, old stripper
Please no skinny dippers
In the wading pool tonight

Hey, old stripper
Please un-Poligrip yer
Dentures from my butt

Your Vote & Comment Counts

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 

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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.1
How Funny: 4.2
Overall Rating: 4.2

Total Votes: 13

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   3
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   10

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Matthias - April 26, 2010 - Report this comment
Such a disturbing topic but such a catchy song, which makes me want to hear it again but at the same time I fear for my sanity if I do hear it again...
LilDaisyTripper - April 26, 2010 - Report this comment
To the Staff at Spaff . . . love the denture line !
Jeff Reuben - April 26, 2010 - Report this comment
I don't remember you being at my bachelor party, but you obviously were, you described some of the details perfectly! And I was probably too loaded to remember.
Lee - April 26, 2010 - Report this comment
Haha. Very funny parody. 5's.
Jack Wilson - April 27, 2010 - Report this comment
Awesome! 5s Its The Hangover meets Driving MIss Daisy!
Dan Creeden - April 27, 2010 - Report this comment
Great Job. Instead of Three 5's, can I give you fifteen 1's for the stripper.
Jack Wilson - April 28, 2010 - Report this comment
Recording is f***ing HILARIOUS
Jack Wilson - April 28, 2010 - Report this comment
Hey this reminds me, that recording of Nailing Charlie's Angels still around? - May 14, 2010 - Report this comment
Wow, I haven't thanked you guys for your comments yet? How much do I suck? (Don't answer that.) Thanx, Matthias & LilDaisyTripper & Jeff & Lee & Dan & Jack & Jack & Jack!

Jackie: I have to have that somewhere. Shoot me your email address and I'll track it down and send it to you.
Here it is - May 16, 2010 - Report this comment
John Barry - August 29, 2012 - Report this comment
Your train of thought is disturbingly funny.

The author of the parody has authorized comments, and wants YOUR feedback.

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