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Song Parodies -> "I Fail At Art"

Original Song Title:

"The Way I Are"

Original Performer:

Timbaland ft. Keri Hilson, D.O.E. & Sebastian

Parody Song Title:

"I Fail At Art"

Parody Written by:

the_conqueror_of_parodies

The Lyrics

Part of my "United State of Pop" self-challenge. A man is convinced that he can't art worth beans...but is he telling the truth? Or is he just wangsting himself into oblivion? Enjoy!
My art sucks, plain to see

Yeah, yeah, yeah (mm, mm, mm, mm, mm)
Yeah, yeah, yeah (mm, mm, mm, mm, mm)
I can't draw a damn thing
Yeah, yeah, (mm, mm, mm, mm, mm)

I know I'm no Monet
Know I'm no da Vinci paintin' Mona's face
Might compare me to Picasso
But at least with him it was on purpose, okay
Cubism, word

Oh, dunno why I draw when I know there's no ski-ill in me, yeah
Ev'ry scribble is one I wish I cou-ould unsee (oh) geez
Whether happy clouds or somethin' da-ark and blea-eak
Damn the clouds, I can't get 'em ri-ight

All my work is shit, my own worst critic
Cause I'm well aware I fail at art
Tried charcoal a bit, smudged it all to shit
It's just more proof that I fai-ail at art
Watercolours? Please, mine's too runny
Wrecked the paper cause I fail at art
You'd think I'd take the hint, but I keep at it
Don't know why, know I'm so shite

"It's no Mona Lisa"
That sure is one hell of an understatement
Not sayin' you're idiotic
But to not see my art is crap means you're quite dense
It makes me hurl

Oh, I've tried stickmen but my pics are still bad a-as can be-e, yeah
Colour someone else's work? Can't do tha-at worth beans (oh) geez
Even tracing looks hideous do-one by me-e
Friggin' hands, they can't draw things ri-ight

I've read lots of tips, haven't worked for shit
Cause, as you can see, I fail at art
Almost got it, shit! Broken pencil tip
Another reason I fai-ail at art
Photoshop? Please, screw up hotkeys
Just another way I fail at art
I tried that inking shit, but all of it dripped
Right on my shoes, see, I fai-ail at art (yeah)

Oh my word (yeah, yeah)
I just tried the collage route, I just threw up in my mouth
Oh my flippin' word (yeah, yeah)
Tried to sculpt but that's a nope, no Michaelangelo
I'm sayin' oh my word (yeah, yeah)
Claimed my art-fails are po-mo, could be the way to go
But what happened, my word (yeah, yeah)
Po-mo critics said it was crap, guess I'm doomed to crap, yeah

Art critics are too picky, no pleasin' them
But pleasin' me's a story quite different
Like Jagger, can't get no satisfaction
Although why I still continue I just can't fathom
Don't have to take my word
I've got 'bout a shitload of rooms packed full of shitty art
Can't even sketch in dirt
Don't dare say that you like my art, to me it's arse

Oh, there's no audience for my work, you can't co-onvince me, yeah
Haven't tried DeviantArt, though I kno-ow it's free (oh) geez
I've heard stories 'bout trolls, don't want the-em on me-e
Even so, my work is still shi-ite

Know I won't get hits cause my work is shit
It's a proven fact I fail at art
Not gonna try it, won't register a blip
Ev'rybody knows I fai-ail at art
All of these critiques that I've framed, see
Prove to the world that I fail at art
Yes, I wrote them, you twit, no other critic
That I trust, and thus I fai-ail at art

Try this online shit, no way in hell, git
There's no point because I fail at art
My art's total shit, no-one's gonna click
Just one glance they'll see I fai-ail at art
Pretend to be me, so that I'll see
That I, in fact, do not fail at art?
You've already done it, and there's tons of hits?
Can't be right, not right, they're lies

This was originally gonna be called "I Suck At Art", but then I realised before I even started writing that "fail" rhymed better with the original song. This has been your pointless trivia factoid for the day.

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 3.0
How Funny: 3.0
Overall Rating: 3.0

Total Votes: 2

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

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 2   0
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 3   0
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 4   0
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 5   1
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User Comments

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Brittany - August 06, 2014 - Report this comment
LOL I loved this. It was the funniest parody I read in a while. Kinda describes my art when I submit to Deviantart. You may fail at art but your parody-writing gets 5 stars!

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