Song Parodies -> Yellowknife

Original Song Title:

"Otherside"

Original Performer:

The Red Hot Chili Peppers

  
Parody Song Title:

"Yellowknife"

Parody Written by:

Rocky Mak

I've always referred playing chords in a piano or guitar is like driving a truck with many gears, so here's my rather half-hearted attempt about trucking.

I'm writing as a rookie driver in the ice roads of Yellowknife, but I had a REALLY bad run with just my maiden load. Guess the test of perseverance really does take a toll. Events based on Season 1 of "Ice Road Truckers"
[Complaining on the Ingraham Trail on his first load]
How long, how long
Is the drive
From here to Diavik mine [a diamond mine]?

I don't
I don't believe it's fair
My heaviest load
With the road corroded

[Recalling how he started]
I've seen some snow
On my paperback
The newest challenge
After "Great Outback" [The road trains in Australian Outback]

Prefer the winter
And the cold icy tracks
I gotta take a plane to Yellowknife

[The plane only got him to Vancouver from Perth, Australia, so he bought a truck and drove to Yellowknife]

The hot, dry weather?
Never meant for me
For 60 days
My truck is right on the sea
A major change
But I've big cash in mind

I gotta get me up to Yellowknife
Take a load from Yellowknife
Take it on
Bring it on

[Revising the routes]
How long, how long
Is the drive
From here to Yellowknife?

I don't
I don't believe it's bad
A slippery road
But I'm driving slowly

[Two days later, the bad start]
Poured some coffee to the coffee mug
Was 'bout to leave
But my gears all got stuck
I've got my load
But I'm on a duck [cricket term: 0 loads, 0 tons, no money earned]

I gotta fix my truck
Leave Yellowknife

[Percussion solo to signify passage of time and the time I left my hazard lights on.]

[Few hours later]
My trip got started
Yet to make the bend [On Ingraham Trail]
A candidate of worst crash ever been
A speeding trucker
Flipped and blocked all lanes

I'll never leave the trail
And hit the ice
To Lockhart Lake [Rest Stop]
And sleep the night

Takes too long
Dragging on

How long, how long
Is the drive
From here to Diavik mine?

[Reporting back to the boss over the radio]
I don't
I don't believe I'm careless
The whole road closed
To a sloppy driver

[The impatient rant (clean version)]
Got to here
Bought my new and hot ride
Worn me out
Waiting here in Yellowknife
I yelled and said that
"It was not my mess"
Will I depart?
When can I start
[To] Be on the road again?

[Guitar solo to signify the frantic rush to reopen the road]

[Back to the present time, negotiating the Ingraham Trail, so he is still not on the ice by the time the song is done.]
How long, how long
Is the drive
From here to Diavik mine?

I don't
I don't believe it's fair
I'm stuck on the only
Load I've ever had

I don't
I don't believe it's fair
My heaviest load
With the road corroded
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Pacing: 5.0
 
How Funny: 4.3
 
Overall Rating: 4.3
 

Total Votes: 3
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