I'm coming in from outside
And I’m real dirty-like swine
My mom is sporting a frown
Not happy at all
It had a whole bunch of fun
Swimming around in the mud
It was only the mud, it was only the mud
Now I’m going upstairs
And she’s running a bath
This must be some kind of joke
Because I can hear her laugh
Now I step in the tub
Try to make it real quick
Wash the dirt off my head
And I’m scrubbing my chest
Now, I wash off the dirt
Now, can I go?

And it’s just not fair- she’s making me
I have no control
My ducky, swimming here right next to me
After making some mudpies
She made me come right inside
And I was outside all day
Playing in the mud made me
Feel this shampoo in my eyes
Cause now it’s bathtime

I’m coming in from outside
And I’m not dirty this time
My mom’s not sporting a frown
Because she doesn’t know
I have a plan that exists
And it goes something like this…
I have a plan that exists. It goes something like this.
When she’s falling asleep
I’ll sneak out of my room
I’ll go play in the mud
I will go fulfill my youth
And then I’ll go back to bed
And I’ll sneak in real slick
Got it up in my head
And I’m real impressed
Now, but she’s like possessed
Now, she saw me

And it’s just not fair- she’s making me
I have no control
My ducky, swimming here right next to me
After making some mudpies
She made me come right inside
And I was outside all day
Playing in the mud made me
Feel this shampoo in my eyes
Cause now it’s bathtime

I’ll never...
Be clever
I never...
Whatever…