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Song Parodies -> "Corset Pain"

Original Song Title:

"Chocolate Rain"

Original Performer:

Tay Zonday

Parody Song Title:

"Corset Pain"

Parody Written by:

the_conqueror_of_parodies

The Lyrics

You like pain? Try wearing a corset!
Corset pain
They squeeze tightly, causing such a strain
Corset pain
I know the point is "try to make one thin"
Corset pain
But I would say it's far from a safe bet
Corset pain
A simple diet will help your fat shed
Corset pain
Was invented in the days gone by
Corset pain
When women could not do much, just sigh
Corset pain
Wonder how they taught themselves to brace
Corset pain
For the tightening of all that lace
Corset pain
Metal, ivory or bone of whale
Corset pain
Would turn faces far from standard pale
Corset pain
Slap on makeup filled with lead, oh wait
Corset pain
Shifted topics, that's just frigging great

Corset pain
Forcing women into sexy shapes
Corset pain
Turning one the colour of a grape
Corset pain
Squeezing women into slimmer shapes
Corset pain
Who needs oxygen when you're a grape?

Corset pain
Organs get squashed, but where do they go?
Corset pain
Stomach in your diaphragm? Oh no
Corset pain
Spleen's not faring better, have to say
Corset pain
And your poor kidneys might merge one day
Corset pain
Ev'ry sentence always ends in "ow"
Corset pain
Least that's when you can talk anyhow
Corset pain
Wasp-ish waists may be a pretty sight
Corset pain
But thank God that they get undone at night
Corset pain
Well, at least I hope that was the way
Corset pain
Otherwise they'd sleep with scrunched-up waists
Corset pain
Of course I know that sounds straight-up insane
Corset pain
But I would not be shocked if that's the case

Corset pain
Cramming women into thinner shapes
Corset pain
Without popping them just like a grape
Corset pain
Crushing women into ant-like shapes
Corset pain
I think ants also have things for grapes

Corset pain
Can still buy the things quite easily
Corset pain
But they're not as tight a squeeze on thee
Corset pain
What stopped the old-style corsets getting made?
Corset pain
Metal was needed by the USA
Corset pain
Cost for war production was quite high
Corset pain
Needed all they could, corsets? Goodbye
Corset pain
Bit more complex than all that, okay
Corset pain
From what I've read, they've not gone away
Corset pain
They're a big part of BDSM
Corset pain
Steampunk too, since that's Victorian
Corset pain
I'm just harping on one fact that galls
Corset pain
That phrase said 44 times, plus four

Corset pain
Mashing women into slender shapes
Corset pain
Fashionable to look like a grape
Corset pain
Forcing women into the same shape
Corset pain
Surely men have a fetish for grapes

This corset is really uncomfortable, so can we please just wrap it up?

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 6

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

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 2   0
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 3   0
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 5   6
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User Comments

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2LD4U - March 01, 2018 - Report this comment
I read that the REAL reason women wore corsets back in the day was not to make themselves more attractive; doctors actually thought women's bodies could not support themselves. Seriously!
Rob Arndt - March 01, 2018 - Report this comment
Half true. Women's corsets were mostly for lift. Men also wore corsets for constriction.
Brad Snyder - March 02, 2018 - Report this comment
The tangents are hilarious! (“...like a grape...ant-like shapes...ants have a thing for grapes...”, et al). 5 ant-like grapes!

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