It's RESERVES I hate,
Because RESERVES warp the auction's fate,
Does the Seller know,
That He's a Lame-O!!!
'Cause RESERVES get old!!!
He should have been told,
That RESERVE-FREE items,
Let the auction unfold.
Sometimes I lay in my bed,
Evil thoughts run through my head,
I feel better now I've said,
These Ebayer's need to be shot DEAD!!!


CHORUS: And throught it all,
It offers the Seller protection,
But why not start the auction out then,
at the price they want!!!,
I wish the auctions all...
were bloody Hell RESERVE-FREE,
That would certainly please me!!!
Wouldn't it be a ball,
To take an UZI,
And shoot these Ebayer's DEAD!!!


My stomach gets weak,
When I see a RESERVE...I have to meet!!!
I look above........and I know someone must hate my guts!!!
And as the feeling grows,
To rip the flesh from their bones,
And shoot them all dead...
I go to AMPLAND instead!!!


Repeat Chorus Two more Times