La la la, la la la, la la la la la, Ohhh
(You know, you ever dream like this before?)
La la la, la la la, la la la la la, Ohhh
(The feeling's just so real)

Hey, I'm workin' for Dunder Mifflin Paper Co.
With Jim and Michael; Britney Spears answering phones
Confusion's plantin'
'Cause we're not in Scranton, which ain't cool
Instead we're working at my Junior High School

Here's a question, can't figure out the answer
Now why is Kevin dressed like a hula dancer?
And what's the crazy sound?
Start window gazing
And I can't control my fear, 'cause I saw a mushroom cloud!

"S-O-S, let's call Jack Bauer,
He's got power...to make this go a-WAY!"
But he will not get on board
The bombers come in and I'm filled with fright

I'm so stressed, won't someone help me?
They compel me; a bag over my FACE
I wish that I had a sword
And I just toss and turn during my dreams at night

Scene skips; THE bad guys now have Jim and me
We're tied from behind inside a submarine
Up front, I look and see they also have Brit-ney
She's holding a sign that says "These guys are mean!"

Can't stand THE way that they are treatin' me
They offer me wine, but know that I don't drink
I'm lost, 'cause I can't figure what they want with me
Logic I can't see, but it's mak-in' me think

Flash again and now I see we're in a hideaway
I notice Jim is dressed like Rock Hudson, I'm Doris Day
My tummy's up in knots
'Cause I don't like this dirty plot
As soon as they walk out the door, Britney pulls out a Glock

Hopefully (uh-huh)
She'll use the gun to free us, right?
Turns on me
And says "I think that Jim is mine tonight!
Don't make a move!"
But I say "Are you for real?"
She says, "I planned this all, 'cause I want your man to steal!"

"S-O-S, come ON, Jim, help me!
She's not well she...needs to be put a-WAY!
Get us a get-a-way car
She'll be committed when we break out, right?"

It's time she learned she shouldn't mess with me
Jim comes from behind, and grabs her; "That's m'boy!"
He laughs and takes the gun from her for me to see
Made real-IST-ic-lly, but it's Sean Preston's toy

Skip time; we're back on dry land suddenly
And Britney is blind; a cane she's usin' it
Our CAP-tor is a man whose face I cannot see
Wants to tickle me; I feel like choosin' it

Oy! A van pulls up and doors they o-pen
And boy! I wanna get out soon, I'm ho-pin'
Because Roy, the driver of the van is to-kin'
And I'll look guilty when I'm not
If all my clothes they smell like pot
I'm cryin'

S-O-S, I hope he's stopping!
To go shopping...for Lysol and Fe-BREZE
Now we are stuck by a car
Holding Vin Diesel, I scream at the sight

I cry, "Please Triple X, come rescue me!
With all of your strength, 'cause you're not using it!"
He smirks, says "I think you've seen too man-Y movies
Ev'ry film you see, you're just abusing it!"

It's time, now my a-larm is waking me
I'm leaving behind, th'dream I'm losing it
I'm pissed, instead of waking I would rather be
With Jim AND Britney, so now I'm snoozin' it

La la la, la la la, la la la la la, Ohhh,
Oh Oh
La la la, la la la, la la la la la, Ohhh,
Oh Oh