Going online to look at porn tonight,
and there's a sale on, don't you know
on EBay I tried to sell a photo
waiting for,
some dumb punter who thinks they really need
a polaroid thats, really blurred

blunt knife,
used lard,
con act,
sold out

Buy that frog, the plastic one with spots on
there's goods to flog, but nothing that you would want
click right here, for computer games to play
beat that bid, for something weird off EBay

ghost pic.
car mag.
elvis
handbags

Going online to look at porn tonight,
and there's a sale on, don't you know
on EBay I tried to sell a photo
waiting for,

old crap,
knick knacks
solder,
flat packs

buy that bike, though the left pedal has gone
this I swear, is Maggie Thatchers Tampon
it's not quite, something that is a real con
please please buy, before the item has gone

model,
trainline,
crap stuff,
some junk

Going online to look at porn tonight,
and there's a sale on, don't you know
on EBay I tried to sell a photo
waiting for,
some dumb punter who thinks they really need
a polaroid thats, really blurred

on EBay I tried to sell a photo
waiting for,

ooh ahh, fixing and a' bidding
ooh ahh, fixing and a' bidding
ooh ahh, fixing and a' bidding
ooh ahh,

Going online to look at porn tonight,
and there's a sale on, don't you know
on EBay I tried to sell a photo
waiting for,
some dumb punter who thinks they really need
a polaroid thats, really blurred
on EBay, i thought there were some mugs here, like before#

Going online to look at porn tonight,
and there's a sale on, don't you know
on EBay I tried to sell a photo
waiting for....