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Song Parodies -> "It's Not Salted"

Original Song Title:

"All You Wanted"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Michelle Branch

Parody Song Title:

"It's Not Salted"

Parody Written by:

the_conqueror_of_parodies

The Lyrics

A customer is furious about a certain thing missing from their meal. Enjoy!
Ju-ust wa-anted some real ni-ice food
No-ot ha-ard, or so you would think
Be-ecau-ause you've screwed up my-y food
Ru-ui-ined my pe-erfect da-ay
What is the pro-oblem? It isn't co-old, man
Nor is it too-oo hot, temp'rature's okay
No problems with ho-ow the salad turned ou-out, man
Didn't dre-ench it in dressin', that's grea-eat

What you di-id do to my poo-oor foo-ood
Is so much worse than tha-at, I fea-ear
Just taste it, you-ou'll find
Somethin' missi-in' there
See? It's not salted
That's way worse than a hai-ee-ai-air

It's not a jo-oke, see
Because you to-old me
You'd guarantee I'd get complete satisfactio-o-on
But I'm not ha-appy
It seems that you lied to me-e
Now I'm really pissed o-off

I want fre-esh food, a refu-und too-oo
Excuses, I don't wa-ant to hea-ear
Should've got i-it right
The first time, ca-an't bear
To have unsalted food, it's sinful, I swea-ee-ea-ear

I want salt right now, givin' you this gla-are
Get the owner if you're gettin' sca-a-ared
Oh-oh-oh-oh yeah-eah-eah

Taste this bla-and food, that should be-e proo-oof
That at your job, you ju-ust don't ca-are (dare you to have a ta-a-aste)
You're not the che-ef, fine
Should've yelled ba-ack there
That I want salted food, this plain isn't fa-ee-a-a-a-are
Oh-ooh-oh-oh-oh, oh-oh-oh-oh, oh-oh, oh-oh
You will ge-et sued (yes, you'll be-e su-u-ued)
You'll be so-o scre-ewed (oh-oh)
Lose your bus'ness cause you-ou don't ca-are (you'll get shut down toda-ay)
What's that? I shou-ould find (woah-oh-oh-oh)
Salt shakers ri-ight there (oh-ooh-oh-oh)
Upon my table, weren't there before, I swea-ee-ea-ear

You should've to-old me
That they were there, still pee-eeved
I guess I'll shuffle off

Well honestly, how were they supposed to see the salt shaker? It's not like they're nearly always the centrepiece of the table and usually right next to the wine list or something. Basic observation skills are for poor people!

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 2.5
How Funny: 2.5
Overall Rating: 2.4

Total Votes: 14

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   7
 7
 8
 
 2   1
 1
 0
 
 3   1
 1
 2
 
 4   2
 2
 1
 
 5   3
 3
 3
 

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