(Screw, freak, fork!)

(Woo-hoo! Woo-hoo!)
(Woo-hoo! Woo-hoo!)

The news farts know me better than I know myself,
Or so those guys bray when they go hee-hawing.
(Woo-hoo! Woo-hoo!)
Came upon a fork, apropos of nothing,
'Tween a big black dork and a were-harpy.
(Woo-hoo! Woo-hoo!)

I felt real queer to hear that quack,
'Cause I don't shoot smack or heed that hawking.
(Woo-hoo! Woo-hoo!)
Then the big black dork, he looked my way;
Said "Hey there, P! Will you vote for me?"
(Woo-hoo! Woo-hoo!)

But I said
"No, no,
No, no no no!"
I said
"No, no,
You're not the one for me."
"No, no,
No, no no no!"
I said "No, no,
You're not the one for me."

(Ooh! Woo-hoo!)

The old tart's got a problem with her partner's rowrs,
So she's stopped his meds for a week or two.
(Woo-hoo! Woo-hoo!)
'Cause he whupped long pork, and he shouldn't have done that,
But she still won't give it after all these years!
(Woo-hoo! Woo-hoo!)

So I've come upon a race and a helping of despair,
'Tween a big black dork and a were-harpy.
(Woo-hoo! Woo-hoo!)
And we can't go back and we're none too happy,
'Cause we're all getting forked, any jerk can see! (Yeah...)
(Woo-hoo! Woo-hoo!)

And I say
"No, no,
No, no no no!"
I say
"No, no,
You're not the ones for me."
"No, no,
No, no no no!"
I say
"No, no,
You're not the ones for me."

(Ooh! Woo-hoo!)
(Not the ones for me, yeah...)
(Ooh! Woo-hoo!)

I say
"No, no, no, no,
No, no, no,
No, no!
You're not the ones for me."
"No, no, no, no,
No, no, no,
No, no!
You're not the ones for me."

Big black dork and a were-harpy;
This makes no sense because those farts break endlessly! (Yeah, yeah, yeah!)
Big bla-ack (dork) and a were-harpy;
Can't get there from here 'cause they've all been forking me!