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Song Parodies -> "Allergic"

Original Song Title:

"Addicted"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Kelly Clarkson

Parody Song Title:

"Allergic"

Parody Written by:

Ravyn Rant

The Lyrics

I'd like to dedicate this to half the freaking office. Sometimes, my co-workers make me literally ill...
Looks like I'm stuck
Stuck with you polluting the whole damn town
I'm out of luck
Left my inhaler in cubicle nine
How I'd like to make you go home and shower
And change your nasty underwear, I bet it reeks and it's turning brown

Low tide at the beach
Drenched in Eternity
You're making me heave
It's getting harder to breathe
No cologne will make you smell like a flower
And there's no inhaler that is gonna clear my lungs in time

And now I can't breathe
And now I can't taste anything
But your perfume
I'm allergic to you
My god how you stink
Your odor's nauseating me
How it burns, it's like Mace
I'm clawing at my face
It sucks to be me
It sucks to be me

You won't get lost
Your perfume leaves me so slowly
Olfactory ghost that's haunting me
Please just go home
Must you try to smell like you were all the whores in France?
Must you try to cover up the smell of bad nasty poopy pants?

It's making me sneeze
Because I can't smell anything
Nothing but you
I'm allergic to you
It hurts when I blink
There's an uninterrupted stream
Stream of snot, down my face
It's all over the place
It sucks to be me
It sucks to be me

That cheap perfume, it makes me sick, you bathe in it
Excuse my fit, I swear that I'm not faking it
Just wash it off, scrub it, would you please get rid of it
I might break a window to get me through this

I'm done with you, the hell with this, I won't take it
Just one more time, I promise you will regret it
So wash it off, scrub it, you'd better get rid of it
Gonna break a window to get me through this

Because I can't breathe
Because I can't feel anything
But your perfume
I'm allergic to you
Could you go a day
Without asphyxiating me?
I thought not, so it seems
I'm never to breathe free
It sucks to be me
It sucks to be me

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.8
How Funny: 4.7
Overall Rating: 4.8

Total Votes: 6

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

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 4   1
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 5   5
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User Comments

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Casey - August 10, 2006 - Report this comment
Man oh man, do I know what you mean! I know exactly who you are referring to and you are not exaggerating!
alvin rhodes - August 10, 2006 - Report this comment
makes me glad i work alone...i feel your pain
Stuart McArthur - August 10, 2006 - Report this comment
I just loved "olfactory ghose" Ravyn, because that's exactly what stays in the room after they've gone - brilliant! - 555
Red Ant - August 11, 2006 - Report this comment
Funny work Ravyn Rant. I've worked with people before who were actually sent (scent? ;-)) home to go shower and change clothes. The worst part was that it happened at a wastewater treatment plant, where bad smells are commonplace....one has to be exceptionally malodorous to get sent home from a place like that.
Ravyn - August 11, 2006 - Report this comment
Thanks to all of you! Red - I wish they'd send these people home! And here's the ironic part - the company I work for has a scent-free policy. Sadly, some of the worst offenders are management!
backstreetgrl - April 29, 2007 - Report this comment
^wow, that IS ironic! lol I loved this one.

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